How Robin Got Barney to Love Again
by FictionWriter91
Summary: Devastated about Ted and Victoria, Robin decides to give in and be Barney's bro for the night. Unsure of why she's doing it, Robin finds herself no longer thinking about Ted. Then, she possibly makes the biggest mistake of her life, but somehow, it feels right. Barney discovers that underneath all the hurt, there is still love. Can Robin finally break the shell around his heart?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello! So this is my first official HIMYM fanfiction (aside from my crossover with Friends), and I hope it's all right. I've been watching this show a lot in the past few months, and I feel I've gotten the hang of the characters. It always bothered me to no end that Robin effectively ruined all of Ted's relationships because she did the "I want you, I don't want you" game over and over again. Then they killed off Tracy so Ted wouldn't do what he did to Victoria, who, by the way, I loved. She was amazing. She so didn't deserve that ending...twice. Robin and Barney just made way more sense as they were so similar. Anyway, enough of my rambling. This is my version of what could have happened the night Robin acted as Barney's bro. I hope it hasn't been done before. Please enjoy!**

* * *

 _"I know who she is."_

Why? Why had she said those words? They only caused this pain that she was feeling right now. Why hadn't she just kept her damn mouth shut?! Here they were, together, kissing. That's all they seemed to do lately. Robin hated seeing Ted with Victoria. It broke her inside, not that she'd admit that to anyone. Lily kept giving her looks of course because she knew, and Robin was pretty sure Marshall knew too by the way he was effectively trying not to look at her while Ted was macking on Victoria right on front of her. He had found her at the bakery all thanks to Robin telling him. She didn't know why she had given him that golden information when she really had wanted to blurt out her feelings. She looked away from them. Barney was just smirking as always, drink in hand. Robin wasn't really sure why she was so broken up over Ted. She didn't want to get married or have children. She put her career first. They wanted different things. It made no sense at all why she wanted to be with him now other than the fact that he was happy with someone else, like a child who wants a toy when some other child has it. What was wrong with her?

"I have to get to work," Victoria said, giving Ted one last kiss, making Robin want to vomit.

"I'll call you later," Ted said, watching her walk away. Ugh, it was all so gross. Robin looked away to see Barney watching her carefully. She averted her eyes. It was another day. She really hoped things would get better.

 **Three Weeks Later**

It didn't get better. Now Ted was complaining about how Victoria was keeping him waiting for sex. Well, if it was up to Robin, she wouldn't make him wait. Oh, how she wanted to verbalize that! She had to get the topic off of Victoria and right now.

"So, I don't have to cover that cat story tonight," Robin said after a moment of silence. "Who's up for hanging out?"

"Can't," Ted said immediately. "I'm taking Victoria out for dinner."

"It's our nine year anniversary," Lily chimed in. "We're going to Berkshires for the maple syrup harvest."

"Wow, you're relationship is officially a ninth grader," Robin joked. Lily and Marshall grinned at each other.

"Yea, should be fun. It's one of the top five romantic getaways on a budget," Marshall informed them.

"Looks like it's just you and me," Robin said quietly, looking at her drink.

"Really?" Barney asked.

"Oh, no, I was talking to my martini," Robin replied quickly. Why did he sound so surprised anyway?

"Too bad," Barney said, winking. "I'm a fun guy."

"Oh boy," Robin said, downing her drink.

"Well, gotta go," Ted said, getting up. "Gonna meet Victoria now."

"And we gotta go pack," Lily said. She and Marshall left together. Robin looked over at Barney, who was still sipping his drink.

"And then there were two," he said, grinning.

"I'm glad you refer to your drink as a third person too," Robin said, getting up and leaving herself. She missed the look of disappointment on Barney's face.

...

"I can't believe he dumped me again," Giselle was crying. Robin wanted to punch herself in the head. Multiple times. They had gone through this a few months ago already, and that was when she had met Ted. It was like a repeat of that night, only Ted was off with Wonder Woman and not here trying to meet a girl. Oh, how Robin hated herself for not just going with it when he'd said he loved her.

"Maybe you should just stay single for a while," Robin suggested. "Take things slow."

"And end up like you?" Giselle scoffed.

"I'm going to ignore that," Robin said, hurt.

"Daddy's home," Barney's voice said, approaching their table.

"Barney," Robin said, annoyed. He looked genuinely surprised to see her there.

"Sorry, Scherbotsky," Barney apologized. "Who's your friend?"

"I'm Giselle," Giselle said, simpering.

"She's not for sale," Robin told Barney, pushing him away. He gnashed his teeth in annoyance.

"Robin!" Giselle whined.

"Oh, trust me, I just saved you another heartache," Robin assured her. "Excuse me, I have to use the bathroom." She stood up abruptly and hurried away. Once inside the bathroom, she rested her hands against the counter and looked in the mirror at herself. What was wrong with her? All she could think about was Ted. Ted's arms. Ted's lips. Ted's voice. Ted, Ted, Ted. She was obsessed. She bit back the tears. She was _not_ going to cry again. Not here. She splashed some water on her face and dried it off before heading back out.

"I bet Heaven's really missing you right now," Barney said as she walked out. Then he saw her.

"Aw, man!" he said. "Really?"

"Again? Barney, you need to start paying attention to your victims," Robin snapped before rejoining Giselle at the table. They sat and watched other people talking and hanging out. Robin wasn't really sure why she was friends with Giselle. They had met at the News Station where Giselle did make up, and they had hit it off. Plus, Robin had just moved to New York and was lonely. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. Then Giselle left for a different job, but they had stayed in touch. Robin wished they hadn't. Giselle was a bit self-centered.

"Can you get me another drink?" Giselle asked almost huffily. Robin stopped her eyes from rolling. Case in point.

"All right," she said, getting up and moving to the bar. She placed her order with Carl and waited.

"Hundred dollars says that when you turn around, I say 'wow,'" Barney's voice sounded again.

"Barney, this is the third time you've hit on me by accident," Robin said, turning to face him.

"Damn it! See, this is where Ted came in handy before he ran off to be monogamous. He'd let me know if the girl was hot before I did this," Barney cursed.

"Why don't you just look in the mirror to see if they're hot?" Robin suggested. He looked skeptical.

"You can't just...wow!" He looked over at the mirror. "Brilliant idea!"

"Hey, what's taking so long?" Giselle called, looking annoyed. Robin sighed.

"I gotta go," Robin said.

"Wait, wait," Barney said, grabbing her arm. "I could use you. That mirror thing, simple. Elegant. Here's a one time offer to be my bro wingman tonight."

"As tempting as that sounds," Robin said sarcastically. "I am with a friend who just got dumped. She needs my support..." She looked over to see Giselle making out with some random guy. "...or a stranger's tongue down her throat," she finished. "That seems healthy. All right, I'm in."

"Yes!" Barney exclaimed. "High five!"

"I'm not there yet," Robin answered.

...

Robin went home to change. What was she doing? Why was she hanging out with Barney? It seemed so...pointless. However, if it was going to help her forget about Ted, then it was worth trying. She even decided to go all out, which she knew would please Barney. It was curious to her why she even wanted to please Barney to begin with. She didn't owe him anything, yet, here she was, suiting up. When she walked into the different bar and saw him sitting there, something inside of her fluttered. It was very peculiar really. Why would looking at Barney do that when she was so into Ted? Then, Barney saw her, and his face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"You suited up!" he exclaimed, pleased.

"I figured if I was doing this, I should do it right," Robin shrugged.

"Emilio?" Barney called. "The woman will have..."

"A Johnny Walker Blue, neat, and a Montecristo No. 2. Thanks," she smiled.

"Nice," Barney nodded, impressed.

"Only way to get my father's attention was through cigars," Robin said.

"Father issues. That's hot," Barney smirked.

"Yea, I was this close to being a slut," Robin joked.

"I'll settle for a bro," Barney winked. "Especially now that Ted can't drink because he's pregnant. Cos he's the girl."

"He can't be pregnant," Robin said. "You have to have sex to get pregnant."

"What up! Freeze frame five!" Barney exclaimed. Robin felt satisfied at her dig at Ted. He deserved it. She sucked on her cigar and exhaled. Tonight was gonna be legendary, and she didn't need Ted.

"So what do you and Ted usually do after this?" she asked.

"Ted's never gotten this far. You've blown him out of the water," Barney scoffed. "However, there is something we could do if you're up for it."

"What's that?"

"Come with me," Barney said, getting up. Robin took one last swig of her drink and puff of her cigar before following him out the door. He was already waiting in a cab.

"Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise," Barney answered. After about ten minutes, they arrived at a building. Robin followed Barney inside where he paid for both of them and had armor and guns handed to them.

"Laser tag!" Robin cried, surprised.

"See, that's the expression I'd love to hear from Teddy boy," Barney said as he put on his gear. Robin quickly donned hers on too, and they hit the floor.

"I can't believe laser tag still exists," she gushed. It was wild, running around and shooting at people.

"Enjoy it before it becomes cool again. I give it two months," Barney said.

"Oh, I believe it. This is awesome!" Robin shouted.

"Okay, follow my lead. You can never be too careful..." Barney started. Robin reached around him and fired. "You just saved my life, didn't you?"

"You can thank me later," Robin said. "Keep moving!" They ran around like devils on a hunt for about forty minutes before getting cornered.

"Damn it, they're everywhere," Robin groaned. "I counted about nine. I'll lay low and give you come cover fire to get out."

"No, I don't leave any man behind," Barney said.

"But..."

"Don't be a hero, Scherbotsky," Barney told her. Robin smiled at him.

"See you on the other side," she said. They both leaped up and aimed, and got completely shot down within seconds.

"Damn," Barney said. "Wanna get a pretzel?"

"Sure."

"All right," he said. They walked out together. Robin couldn't help but notice that Barney was watching her when he thought she wasn't looking. She felt exhilarated. Barney was a fun guy after all, he was right. She realized she hadn't thought about Ted in over an hour. It was a new record. They chatted all the way to McLaren's about the game while Robin wondered about Barney. Why did he insist on being the single man? What had happened to him to never make him want a commitment? It was curious. Barney ordered their drinks while she hopped up on the stool beside him.

"Laser tag takes me way back," she said, accepting her drink from Carl. "You know what game I really miss? Battleship. I never lost a game."

"Neither have I, but I always cheat," Barney laughed.

"Oh yea, me too. Secret is to turn the aircraft carrier into an L," Robin laughed.

"I just stacked all my boats on top of the other," Barney snorted.

"Nice. We should have a cheater's grudge match," Robin said. "Oh, hello! Hottie at the jukebox."

"Oohh good eye, Scherbotsky," Barney said, seeing the woman. "I've got one for you too. Blue shirt, two o'clock."

"That's a woman," Robin said, looking.

"Oh, my bad," Barney said. "Or is it?"

"Just focus on your target," Robin laughed. "Or better yet, allow me." She got up and headed over to the woman, commenting on her jeans.

"Is this a lesbian bar? Cos that woman over there hit on me too," the woman said, gesturing to the woman in the blue shirt.

"No, no, I'm all about the dudes. Slim pickings tonight except for blondie by the bar, and he's playing hard to get."

"Really? Cos he's vibing me pretty good right now. Must be the jeans," the woman laughed.

"Well, jeans will only get you so far. I'm going home with him," Robin said.

"We'll see about that," the woman said, charging over to Barney, who grinned at Robin over her head. They soon moved to a table. Robin felt pleased that she had been able to hook him up. The night was a success. She felt mildly bad for the woman who he was never going to call again after tonight. She sat at the bar and watched as they chatted for a bit. The woman was pouring on the charm, and Barney was soaking it up. Then suddenly, he was heading her way.

"Let's get out of here," he said.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Sometimes you gotta just catch and release," he answered.

"But why?" Robin asked. She didn't understand.

"Leave no man behind," Barney shrugged, smiling at her. "Either we all score or no one scores."

"Right on," Robin said, feeling amazed at his outlook. "Hey, wanna play Battleship?"

"Hit!" Barney said, grinning and starting to leave. Robin looked over at the woman, who caught her gaze. Robin gestured that she was leaving with Barney, and the woman glared in response. Laughing, Robin joined Barney at the top of the steps.

...

At her apartment, Robin went to get the game after thanking Barney for a fun night. When she returned, he was standing in his underpants.

"What are you doing?!" she exclaimed.

"I'm birthday suiting up for you," he answered. "I'm sorry, did you want to undress me?"

"No! I thought we were just hanging out as friends," she said.

"Oh come on. You've been throwing yourself at me all night," Barney said.

"Uh uh, I was throwing other girls at you all night," Robin argued.

"You invited me to come play Battleship. Is that not an international term for sex?" Barney asked.

"Nope," Robin shook her head. "I really meant battleship."

"Huh," Barney said. "Well, I hope you're happy. You sunk my battleship."

"Ew, Barney," Robin said, wrinkling her nose. He put his clothes back on reluctantly.

"It was worth a shot," he said after.

"You and me? That's insane. I can't believe you even thought it for a second," Robin said.

"I thought about it for three seconds, and it makes a lot of sense. We both thing marriage is a drag. We both want something casual and fun, and we clearly get along really well," he pointed out.

"Wow, that actually makes a lot of sense," Robin said, thinking. It really did. There was just one thing. "What about Ted?" There he was. he always came back up again, didn't he? She cursed herself.

"I checked with him," Barney said. "Back at laser tag. I called and asked if he was all right with me hooking up with you, and he totally gave me his blessing."

"Really?" Robin asked. She felt hurt. He really had moved on. "He didn't care that you were going to make a move on me?" What the hell, Ted! It really hurt now.

"Didn't care at all," Barney said, shaking his head. He was looking at her now, and she knew it was all over her face. "You like Ted, don't you?"

"No," she lied.

"Robin..."

"He's moved on! I'm really happy for him..."

"Sure you are. Are we gonna play Battleship or not?" Barney asked. She set down the game, and they started setting up.

"You're not gonna tell him, are you?" she asked.

"Nope. Bro code. A bro doesn't tell another bro that a third bro has a crush on him. Just like the third bro doesn't tell the other bro that the first bro went pickle in front of them. It's quid pro bro."

"Got it," Robin laughed. "A-7."

"Miss," Barney said.

"Of course," she sighed. This went on all night. In the end, Barney had won, and he gloated. Robin just shook her head laughing as she packed up the game. Barney stood at the door petting her dogs, watching.

"What?" she asked, noticing.

"Nothing," he said. "You sure you don't wanna?"

"Barney," she laughed. "I don't think it's a good idea."

"Why not? Ted's with Victoria. We are great together. I think it'd be an awesome idea," Barney finished. They stood there looking at each other, and Robin's mind was on fire. He had a point. Ted was with another woman, and according to Lily, they were having sex tonight while Lily and Marshall were trapped in the bathroom. Ted didn't care that Barney wanted to make a move on her. Why should she stop herself from having fun when he was clearly not thinking about her?

"You're considering it," Barney said, surprised.

"A little," she admitted. He stood there, unsure of what to do next. "I mean, you're right. We have a lot in common. Ted's with someone else. Why waste this moment?"

"I like the way you think," Barney said, moving closer.

"On one condition," Robin said, putting her hand on his chest.

"What's that?"

"We can't tell anyone this ever happened."

"Deal," Barney said quickly. He moved in again.

"Hold up," Robin said, interrupting again.

"This is an interesting approach. It builds the suspense," Barney commented. "I like it."

"I want you to go slow, okay? Let's make this worth it," she said. He looked puzzled.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"All right," he shrugged. They sat down on the couch together, and he moved in slowly to kiss her. Robin couldn't believe how amazing it was. Within moments, it was heating up. She threw out her "take is slow" attitude, and they were in her bed in less than fifteen minutes. The whole experience was incredible, not that she'd ever tell Barney that. It would only inflate his ego that much more. Afterwards, they lay side by side, panting.

"Wow," Barney said. "That was...wow." He sounded genuinely surprised, which pleased Robin a lot.

"Thanks," Robin grinned.

"High five!" Barney exclaimed. They clapped hands. "You want me to stay the night, or should I leave now?"

"I think you can stay a little longer," Robin said suggestively. Ted was so far from her mind right now it wasn't funny. If Barney left, she'd be lying awake all night feeling guilty. Barney moved in for another kiss, and on it went. No more thoughts. No guilt. No regrets. Just her and Barney. It was a perfect ending to a great night.

* * *

 **Thoughts? Should I continue? It'll get more interesting!  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm so glad to see that people like this story! I hope you think this chapter is just as good. Thanks for reading!**

* * *

Barney opened his eyes, forgetting where he was for a millisecond. Then he remembered. He sat up straight, the sheet sliding down his chest. He looked over and found that Robin was not there. Any other time and any other woman, he'd just get up and leave with no goodbyes, but this was Robin. They were friends, sort of, and he didn't want to ruin that.

"You're still here," Robin said, surprised. She had just come from the shower.

"I know," Barney said, just as surprised.

"Don't you usually have some lame excuse to give? Some made up outer space mission to get to?" Robin teased.

"I could make one up for you if that would make you feel better," he said.

"Sure. Why not?" she shrugged, sitting down on the edge of the bed. Barney hesitated.

"All right," he said. "I have to go right now because once that clock turns 8, I disappear, and if I'm not standing by my grave in time, I'll be trapped here as a ghost forever."

"Ah ha ha," Robin fake laughed. "Well, hurry up then." Barney got dressed quickly. He looked over at her, noticing that she avoided looking at him back.

"So what happens now?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you said we can't talk about it, so is that still the deal?"

"Yes. Oh, God, I'd never hear the end of it," Robin breathed.

"Okay," Barney agreed. "This never happened." He moved out of the bedroom, wondering just exactly why did pretending they didn't have sex bothered him so much.

...

Barney spent the day at work day dreaming about the night before. Now, Barney never did this for any girl, so it was new, and it was bothering him. Why was his night with Robin sticking into his brain so much? He was a loner who nailed lonely women. That was his calling. That's what he was best at. So why was he still thinking about her? His phone rang then, and his heart jumped, thinking it could be her. He was disappointed. Another thing that surprised him.

"Go for Barney," he said, knowing it was Ted.

"Hey," Ted said. "So, Marshall is hosting game night tonight, and we need numbers."

"I dunno, Ted," Barney sighed. "I'd be losing out on some hottie just to be sitting with you guys playing some dumb game."

"I'm inviting Victoria," Ted told him. "I want to make a good impression about my friends." Barney straightened in his seat. Victoria was going to be there?

"Is Robin coming?"

"Yea, why?"

"Just wondered," Barney said, looking at his nails. Robin would be upset having to watch the two of them being a couple all night.

"She's one of my friends, so...yea, she's gonna be there," Ted laughed. "Hey, how did it go with you guys last night? Did you nail her?"

Barney spit out the water he was drinking. How did he know?!

"W-what?" he spluttered.

"In laser tag? Did you win?"

"We were a team," Barney answered. His heart was hammering.

"Ah yes, that makes sense," Ted laughed. "Anyway, see you at the bar later?"

"Yea, yea sure," Barney replied. They hung up, and Barney stared at the phone in his hand. How the hell was he going to be around Ted now?

...

Barney was sitting in Ted's apartment watching Marshall drill Victoria for answers on things that would reveal her true character. Barney had to hand it to the guy, he was good.

"Oh, Barney," Lily said. "I went to a party on the 82nd in that new building, and the host said she knew you. Sharon? Shannon?"

"Shannon?!" Barney said, panicked. "Shannon? Shannon. Hmm not remembering any Shannon."

"Really? Cos she gave me a videotape to give..." Lily started.

"Where's the tape?!" Barney demanded.

"Keep your shirt on. I'll go get it," Lily said, getting up to retrieve it. Robin shot Barney a questioning look. He avoided her gaze. When Lily came back with it, he took it and immediately ripped the tape to shreds.

"What was on that tape?" Lily asked.

"Too bad you'll never find out," he answered.

"Oh, damn! If only I had given you a fake tape and hidden the real on in my purse. Oh, wait, that's exactly what I did," Lily boasted, pulling it out. Barney felt his face go white.

"What?!" he exclaimed.

"Drink!" Marshall ordered.

"Well, you were acting so weird about it, so I gave you Ted's graduation tape instead. Shall we pop it in?" she asked everyone.

"Give it to me," Barney commanded, jumping for it. "Give it. Give me!" Lily easily avoided him.

"Play the tape!" Ted cheered. Barney hated him in that moment.

"Ted!" he shouted. "Fine. Fine!" Lily put it in, and he watched himself cry on the tape over Shannon leaving him for a moment before storming out of the apartment. He ran down the stairs and hopped into the first cab he could find. He put his head into his hands as the cab driver pulled out into the street. Damn Lily for doing that to him. Damn Shannon for giving it to her! This whole thing was her fault anyway. Once upon a time he had been a different man. She had changed him. She made it that he never wanted any woman to get close to him and hurt him ever again. If he did the leaving and hurting, he was on top. He knew he had to face them again before the night was over. He just needed to catch his breath first.

...

"Hey, man, we're sorry," Marshall said once Barney sat down.

"Yea, so sorry," Lily chimed in. "But seriously, what's up with that tape?" Barney stood up to leave again.

"No, stay!" Robin cried.

"I'm sorry. I don't really feel like talking about the most embarrassing, humiliating thing that ever happened to me," he said.

"We all have embarrassing stories," Marshall said. "It's good to talk about them."

"All right then, you go first," Barney ordered. "Show me how good it is."

"All right," Marshall agreed. And he did. He launched into a story of how he had a little kid walk in on him while using the bathroom in Lily's classroom. Barney had to stop from rolling his eyes. Amateurs, all of them.

"Okay," Barney said once Marshall had finished. He started telling the story of Shannon. He couldn't help but go back to that time as he talked, how she stood him up on their trip to the Peace Corps.

"She never showed up?" Robin asked. He could hear the sympathy in her voice. He hated it.

"What happened then?" Ted asked.

"You know what, this is a mistake," Barney said, getting up again.

"Wait, what if someone else told an embarrassing story?" Lily asked.

"I'm listening," Barney said. It was decided that Victoria would go, and by the time she was done, Barney had a new respect for her. He decided to carry on with his story. He told them of how Shannon told him to go ahead without her, that her father wouldn't let her go. He started telling how he went back to confront her and tell her she was an adult when he saw her fighting with her father right before kissing him. Then he stopped.

"WHAT?!" they all shouted.

"Now we all have to drink," Marshall said, sticking to the game.

"I don't know..." Barney trailed off.

"One time, Marshall's mom sent us cookies," Lily blurted out.

"Lily, no!" Marshall cried.

"For the team, Marshall. For the team," Lily told him. She told of how she had been on the phone with Marshall's mother and thought she had hung up when Marshall came home and they trash talked the cookies and had floor sex while Mrs. Eriksen heard it all.

"The whole time?" Robin asked, horrified.

"The. Whole. Time," Lily confirmed. Barney couldn't help but grin.

"Dude, that was embarrassing for both of us," Marshall said. "We earned a big chunk of story."

"Fair enough," Barney agreed. He finished telling how Shannon had told him she was with another guy and how he had made her that tape to try and get her back. Then he found out the guy she was with was the guy who congratulated him on dating her to begin with. He had never felt so betrayed. He explained to the group that after this he saw a flyer to "Suit Up," and he changed from a free loving hippie to a Suit.

"You poor thing," Lily empathized.

"I did see her one more time," Barney said.

"Tell us!" Marshall begged.

"I think I might need one last story to help me finish," Barney said, looking directly at Ted. He was going to get that boy to tell the story of the re-return. Seeing how upset Robin was over Ted being with Victoria made him want to make Ted suffer a little bit, even if it meant revealing to Robin that Ted had gone back for her again.

"All right. The green testicle story," Ted started.

"Now Ted, you know the story I want to hear! Everyone else here was man enough to tell the truth. Why can't you?"

"Fine. You're right," Ted said. "Okay..." He told the story of how he got so drunk after failing to get with Robin again and went back to her apartment where he threw up on her carpet outside her door. Victoria was a little stunned looking after he was done.

"You re-returned for me," Robin said, her eyes shining. "That's so sweet. Although, you did ruin my customized mat..."

"I know. I'm sorry," Ted said.

"It's okay," Robin nodded.

"Victoria, I know this must be..." Ted started.

"Oh, it is," Victoria agreed before he finished.

"Wow, Ted, I guess it was dumb to tell that story," Barney said. "But now you get the last piece of my story. Flash forward eight years."

"Wait, that's this year," Marshall said.

"Tonight, to be exact," Barney said. He told them how he found Shannon and got her life story, how he felt for a moment that that could have been his life with her and how he really didn't have anything. Then he laughed and told them that he nailed her and that his life was awesome.

"Nope," Lily said.

"Yeah," Barney told her.

"Nope," she repeated.

"Yeah," he said again.

"I don't buy it. You're making it up," Lily said. "You're trying to cover up the fact that you had a profound moment of doubt about yourself and...Oh my God."

Barney held up the phone for her to see him having sex with Shannon.

"Ladies and gentleman," he said, getting up. "This has been a great evening. I got dirt on all you guys. I got Ted to tell the re-return story, and I finally nailed Shannon! I also rediscovered how awesome my life is. Peace out, hombres!"

"I think Barney just won game night," he heard Marshall say as he left the bar. He smiled to himself.

...

The knocking at his door roused him from his sleep. Blinking at the alarm clock, he noticed it was almost two am. He went to the front door wondering what was happening.

"Robin," he said.

"Did you really do it?" Robin asked.

"Do what?"

"Sleep with Shannon? Or was that some other tape you made of a different girl?"

"I..." Barney's voice died on his lips. Robin had this weird affect on him that made him want to be honest. No, he hadn't actually done it. She was right. It was an old tape he showed Lily. Shannon had hurt him so bad that he never wanted to see her again, not that he would ever admit that to anyone. Except maybe Robin.

"I knew it," Robin said. "I knew you weren't that bad."

"Why are you here?" Barney challenged. "To tell me something I already know?"

"I just spent a whole night with Ted and Victoria pretending I'm fine," Robin said. "I'm exhausted and emotionally drained. I...I thought I'd come here..."

"And do what?" Barney asked, leaning against the door frame.

"I don't know," she answered honestly.

"Robin, I don't know if this is a good thing that we're doing here," Barney said.

"Why not? It's not hurting anyone," Robin said defensively.

"Are you sure?"

"Look, I know you got hurt once before and spend your whole life now avoiding anyone ever getting close to you, but I promise that I'm not going to hurt you," Robin finished.

"Funny, it's not me getting hurt that I'm worried about," Barney said. A lie, yes, but she didn't need to know.

"So you say," Robin challenged. "Just admit that you're scared." Damn, she was good.

"Party's over," Barney said, moving to close the door. Robin threw herself inside, grabbing his arms.

"Fine. Fine! I'll stop trying to make you be honest, but please, I don't want to go home."

"Is this what you really want?" Barney asked, clarifying.

"Yes! Right now, yes," she answered. "Please..."

Without another word, he grabbed her and kissed her, and the whole thing started all over again. Barney found himself feeling strange this time, and he didn't know what that meant. He didn't spend too much time worrying about it, though, since he only had so much time to be with her before they had to wake up and pretend it never happened...again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the kind reviews. I'm glad most of you are enjoying my story :)**

* * *

Robin opened her eyes and saw an unfamiliar ceiling. For a brief second, she forgot where she was. Then, she looked to her left. Barney was lying there, sleeping. She noticed that he was the only one with a blanket, and she was shivering.

"Barney," she whispered, poking his forehead. He didn't stir. The only sound he made was an "urgh" followed by a loud snore. Then he rolled over to his other side muttering, "Mommy." Robin held in her snort of laughter. She craned her neck to look at him. Was he sucking his thumb?!

"Wow," she muttered to herself. Too bad she wasn't recording this to use as blackmail later. She didn't want to wake him, didn't want to relive the awkwardness of the morning after all over again. She slid off the bed and threw her clothes on. She gave him one last glance at the doorway before disappearing out of sight and back to real life.

...

"Where did you go last night?" Lily asked, sipping her drink. Robin avoided her gaze.

"I went home," she lied.

"You were so upset. Did you really go home?" Lily pushed. Robin hated it when Lily pushed. Couldn't anything be a secret?

"Yes. I went home, drank a bottle of wine, and cried myself to sleep," Robin said, making it sound as tragic as possible.

"You poor thing," Lily said, patting her hand. "You really are messed up about this whole thing aren't you?"

"Not messed up. Just annoyed," Robin said. She took a swig of her drink to stall. Her thoughts were conflicted now. Yes, she still thought Ted was cute and would be a nice boyfriend, but now she had Barney trapped in her head as well. She found herself wondering what he was thinking when he got up that morning and found her gone. Was he upset? Annoyed? Mad? Meh-ish? She figured he would be pretty meh-ish about it. He was Barney. He did it to women all the time. Her phone vibrated then, and when she looked at it, his name was there with a text message.

 **You ok?**

She flipped it over, hoping Lily didn't see it.

"You gonna answer that?" Lily asked.

"Get off my back, man," Robin snapped.

"Geez. You need to get laid," Lily huffed. "Settle you down a bit." Robin felt flushed suddenly. Why was it so hot in here?!

"Hey, girls," Victoria said, coming into view. Oh God. She couldn't do it. She could literally smell Ted on her. One thing about Ted was he smelled damn good.

"Hey," she and Lily said at the same time.

"I'm on my way to meet Ted," Victoria started. "It's our two monthiversary, so we are going to dinner."

"Super! That just answered my unasked question," Robin said sarcastically. A flash of hurt passed over Victoria's eyes. It was satisfying.

"Robin," Lily chastised.

"What? We bust on each other. It shows how strong our friendship is," Robin answered.

"Really? Ohhh," Victoria gushed, hugging her.

"Get off me!" Robin snapped. "See? Just did it again." Lily gave her a look. One that was familiar to Robin. It said, _What the hell are you doing?_

"Big plans for tomorrow?" Victoria asked. Lily showed her the bridal dress magazine she was looking at. "I have connections with bridal shops because I do wedding cakes. Wanna go and see if I can get you a discount?"

"That would be awesome!" Lily said, practically vibrating in her seat with excitement.

"Great! Oop, I have to take this," Victoria said, answering her phone and going somewhere for privacy.

"I thought it was just gonna be you and me tomorrow," Robin complained. "What's with getting her to tag along all of a sudden?"

"It's to help you accept that she's with Ted," Lily said. "That's for snapping at me earlier."

"Ugh, you suck," Robin groaned. Lily just shrugged.

"You gotta get along with her sometime, Robin. She's Ted's girlfriend, and we are Ted's friends. As Ted's friends, we are to get along with the person he loves, and he loves Victoria. I'm sorry that it hurts you, but you did have your chance, and you tossed it out the window."

"Blunt much?" Robin asked.

"It's the facts," Lily answered. Victoria returned then, looking disgruntled. "What's wrong?"

"I just got offered a fellowship at a culinary institute in Germany," Victoria answered. She genuinely looked tortured, and Robin felt yet again satisfied.

"Wow," Lily replied. "What are you going to tell Ted?"

"I don't know. I don't know!" Victoria said, panicking. "It's such a great opportunity, but so is being with Ted. Oh God, I don't know what I'm going to do." Robin bit her tongue. She knew Lily would kill her if she made the suggestion she wanted to make. Her phone vibrated again, and she peeked to see Barney had texted her again.

 **You n' me, park, one hour.** She read the directions.

"I gotta go," Victoria said, flustered. "I have to talk to Ted." She hurried away. Lily looked over at Robin, who was hiding her smirk.

"Oh, don't look so smug," Lily scoffed.

"Me? Smug?" Robin asked. "Noooo." But she felt a little smug. Perhaps the perfect little romance wasn't going to last after all.

...

Robin walked to the meeting place Barney had asked her to be at. She paced around, looking at the park bench and the small pond and felt like she was in some kind of hallmark movie where some elderly man was going to suddenly pop up and start feeding ducks. What was the point of this? She wondered.

"Hey," Barney said, coming up next to her.

"Barney, why are we here?" she asked, getting right to the point.

"No reason. Just thought it would be cool," Barney replied, shrugging. Robin looked around them again.

"Really?"

"I used to come here as a kid," Barney admitted. "Brings back memories."

"You're totally bullshitting me right now," Robin laughed. He didn't join in, so she stopped short. "Oh, you're serious."

"Yea. My grandmother and I would come and feed the ducks, hoping the swan would show up."

"Sounds like a nice memory," Robin smiled.

"It is," Barney agreed, disappearing into his thoughts for a moment.

"Sooo why are we here?" Robin prodded. He snapped back to attention.

"Right. Well, you snuck out on me this morning, so I wanted to make sure you were okay," Barney said, leaning against the bench. Robin crossed her arms.

"I'm fine," she replied. "Why would I not be fine?"

"Just a feeling," Barney said.

"Well, I'm completely fine," she went on. "I left because you were sleeping. You looked tired."

"It wasn't because you didn't want to face the whole 'Oh, we just slept together again, and now I'm embarrassed?'" Barney pushed.

"No! No. I just...left," Robin said. They looked at each other for a moment. Barney didn't appear to believe her.

"All right," he finally said. His phone rang, and he looked at it.

"You can answer it," Robin gestured.

"Go for Barney," he said. "Heeey, babe." He turned away to finish the conversation. Robin's interest was peaked. A girl was calling him? She watched him as he talked, and when that smile he got when he was going to have sex came to his lips, she felt angry suddenly. So she was just chop liver now, huh? Well, he could think again if he ever thought she would get back into his bed! He hung up and came back over to her. She was fuming.

"What?" he asked, seeing her face.

"So that's it? You're just gonna start screwing other women again?" Robin asked, getting upset.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Barney said, holding his hands out. "You said you weren't going to get hurt by this. Did you expect me to never sleep with anyone else again?"

"Well...I...you...aaargh!" she shouted, moving past him. She had to get out of there.

"Robin!" he shouted after her. She didn't stop. She felt tears well up in her eyes. What ever made her think that Barney Stinson would stop sleeping around after he slept with her? What kind of fantasy land did she live in? It was awful. She felt like a total fool. Well, she wouldn't let him get the best of her ever again. They were done.

 **The Next Day**

Robin could barely focus as she watched Lily try on dresses. She kept downing glasses of champagne that had been provided for them, and she ignored Victoria's concerned looks. Robin had ignored all of Barney's messages. She didn't go to the bar. She didn't want to see him or talk to him ever again. She was furious at herself for letting her heart get in the way of business.

"So, Victoria, what have you decided about your doughnut adventure?" Robin asked, feeling mean. She wanted an answer. She had to know. If Barney was going to be unavailable, then it was back to Ted. God, was she really that desperate?

"I still don't know. I want to go, but I don't want to leave Ted. I'm considering long distance, not that it ever works," Victoria sighed.

"All talk and no sex, just kill me now," Lily said. She went to try on another dress.

"I know this sounds crazy, but I think Ted is The One," Victoria said, smiling shyly. Robin wanted to chuck her champagne on her face.

"I wouldn't throw away a lifetime opportunity for a guy you've known for only two months," Robin said snidely.

"It's not just any guy, though. It's Ted," Victoria said. "He's amazing. He's the best guy I've ever known."

"German guys are pretty decent too, though," Robin pushed.

"Marshall and I did long distance for a bit," Lily said, coming back. The girls gasped at the dress. It was hideous.

"Oh, boy," Robin said.

"Um," Victoria started.

"It's all right," Lily said. "I hate it too."

"I mean, what's with the design? It's like a mullet!" Robin laughed.

"You and Marshall did long distance," Victoria said, bringing the conversation back. "How did it work?"

"It just did. I mean, I got lonely, but I knew my soul mate was waiting for me, so it made it easier. If Ted's your soul mate, he might be worth hanging on to." Robin shot her a dagger look, which Lily promptly ignored as she went back to try on another dress.

"How do I know, though?" Victoria asked. Then her phone rang. "Speak of the devil!" She answered it.

Robin twisted her hair with her fingers, watching and listening.

"He wants to know if I like cats," Victoria said once she hung up. "Why? Is he buying me one?"

"Maybe he's going to use a kitten to guilt you into staying," Robin suggested.

"That would be just mean," Victoria said. "Would he really?"

"I wouldn't stay to find out. I'd be in Germany," Robin answered. Lily returned then, and they both "awwed" it.

"You suck at lying," Lily said, hands on her hips.

"Take it off. Now," Robin urged. "So, so ugly!"

"This is all wrong. You know what? I'm going to get you one of those dresses from the front," Victoria said, getting up. Lily looked at Robin.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Just fine," Robin lied. How could she explain that she was pissed and upset at Barney for moving on and furious that Victoria thought Ted was her soul mate. Why was this all so confusing to her?! Why was she stuck on two guys? What the hell was wrong with her?!

"Then why are you trying to shove Victoria out of the country?" Lily asked.

"I'm simply supporting her," Robin said. "She has a very important dessert scholarship."

"Robin, you gotta think about what you're doing. Ted loves her. She makes him happy. Don't mess that up for him," Lily warned. Robin stuck her tongue out at her just as Victoria returned with a dress.

"Did someone say princess?" she asked. Lily squealed.

"Oh my God! It's perfect!" she cried, grabbing it from Victoria and rushing to put it on.

"You know, I always thought of myself as someone who wouldn't let a guy interrupt my career," Victoria said. "It's so un-feminist of me to choose Ted over my career."

"I know what you mean," Robin said. She had no idea what she was doing. Why was she helping this girl, the one she despised for being with Ted? A movement outside the window caught her eye, and she saw Barney standing there in the doorway, watching. Then he was gone, but she saw the card he'd left tucked in the mannequin.

"You do?" Victoria prodded, bringing her focus back.

"Yea, I mean, I always choose my career over guys, and some nights are pretty damn lonely," Robin said.

"See, that's what I don't want," Victoria sighed.

"It's not un-feminist to choose Ted over your career. It just means you are happy with him," Robin finished. She itched to see what was in the card.

"You are just the coolest," Victoria said, hugging Robin. "I'm glad we're friends. I'm going to stay." Lily came out then, and they all gasped. She was gorgeous. Unfortunately, she'd never be able to afford the dress. Then, she sat in cake, which the owner discovered before they could do anything about it. Robin knew Lily was devastated to have to spend so much money on a dress that was now covered in raspberry red, but there wasn't anything she could do about it. Instead, she slipped away to get the card Barney had left. She opened it while Lily tearfully paid for the ruined dress.

 **I'm sorry I hurt you. Friends?**

Robin sighed. An apology from Barney was hard to come by. She looked over at Victoria, who, despite being horrified about Lily's situation, was hiding a grin. Ted was gone. Robin knew it was time to move on. She fingered the card. Then she pulled out her phone.

 **Yes, friends.** She wrote back. He sent a smiley in return.

...

Robin was alone with her dogs, drinking wine. She just found out Victoria was leaving after all, and she and Ted were going to do long distance. She didn't know what to think. When knocking happened on her door, she briefly wondered if it was going to be Ted. It wasn't.

"Hi," Barney said, coming in.

"What's up?" she asked.

"I didn't do it," he told her. She stared at him.

"Didn't do what?" she asked.

"Sleep with that girl. In fact, I can't sleep with any other girl right now," Barney said. It looked painful for him to say, and Robin was curious.

"Why not?" she asked.

"Because. The look on your face...I don't ever want to be the cause of that again," Barney said. "And also, every girl I look at, all I see is you. So basically I'm sleeping with you anyway."

"Are you serious right now?" Robin asked, feeling slightly appalled.

"Yes. Robin, I know we're two screwed up people, but we are screwed up together, and if my sleeping with other girls is going to hurt you, then I don't want to do it."

"I...I don't understand. I thought we were just doing this for fun. I didn't think you cared about that kind of thing."

"I thought so too, but something is happening to me, and it's freaking me out. I don't know how to stop it, but all I know is that with you, I feel like my old self, the self I was before Shannon hurt me, and I...I like it. And are you really going to lie and say it didn't hurt that I was going to sleep with someone else?" Barney pressed. "Cos you looked pretty damn upset yesterday at the park when you found out I was going to."

"Barney..." Robin trailed off. She had no idea. He was feeling like his old self? And liking it? How unusual for Barney.

"I...I really want to keep this going, whatever 'this' is," Barney went on. "What do you say?"

"I don't know. Is it healthy for us to keep it secret?"

"I think so. Why ruin it with the others putting their noses into it? Besides, it gives it some fire," Barney grinned. Robin blushed. It did kind of make it all more exciting.

"All right. We'll do this, but I'm not your girlfriend," Robin warned. "No labels."

"And I'm not your boyfriend," Barney agreed. "No labels. Deal." They shook hands.

"Sooo now what?" Robin asked. Barney moved in and grabbed her face with his hands, kissing her hard and long. They were both breathless by the time he was finished.

"Okay," she whispered. She let him envelop her into his arms. Feeling him against her, she actually felt safe.


	4. Chapter 4

Barney didn't know why he had told her he was his old self and liking it. Where did that even come from? What was happening to him? All he knew was when he tried to sleep with someone else, he couldn't. It terrified him. And yet, as he stood there, kissing Robin, it felt so right. The conflict inside of him was steep. He tried not to think about Ted because the guy did love Robin first, but he was with Victoria now. That made it okay. Besides, they hadn't dated or anything yet, so...dibs!

"Mm, shoot," Robin said, breaking the kiss as her phone rang. "It's Ted."

"Ted? Voicemail is his best friend anyway. Just let it ring," Barney said, moving in. Robin couldn't help but let it ring after that. They moved to her couch when a text dinged on her phone. Then another. And another.

"He's not going to stop until I answer," she said, reaching for it.

"Hey, I have a text too," Barney frowned, looking at his phone. After a moment, they both looked at each other.

"Ted's moving to Germany?!" they exclaimed at the same time.

...

Ted was sitting with a somber looking Lily and Marshall when Barney and Robin showed up at the bar. Lily noticed that Robin's hair looked rather...tousled, but Robin was already running her hands through it before she could ask.

"You can't move to Germany!" Barney shouted at Ted as he sat down.

"Why not?"

"Because! You're my best bro, and best bros don't move away for some hoe," Barney said.

"I'm so glad to know how you feel about me," Victoria said, coming up behind them. Barney shrank in his seat a little.

"You guys, I'm doing this," Ted said. "I'm not going to let this girl, this beautiful, wonderful woman, disappear from my life because she has some great opportunity at this time in her life."

"You're so sweet," Victoria smiled, slipping her arm through Ted's.

"Ted, Teddy Ted Ted. You're not thinking straight," Barney spluttered.

"I am, Barney," Ted said. "And you're just going to have to accept it."

"But I...nooooOOOO!" Barney yelled, the "O's" getting louder and more drawn out until he finished. He banged his hands on the table, making the peanuts fly everywhere.

"Ted, are you sure this is what you want to do?" Lily asked. "What about your job?"

"I figure I can design buildings over there too," Ted answered, smiling.

"It's only for two years," Victoria promised. "We'll be back after that."

"Two years?!" Barney gasped, horrified. "No, no, no! Ted, no! Don't do this to me!"

"Sorry, buddy," Ted apologized. He looked at Victoria then. "Guess I should start packing!"

"I'll help," she smiled.

"No!" Barney shrieked, falling off the booth and racing to the door.

"I better get up there before he starts trashing my stuff," Ted said, gesturing. Victoria followed.

...

Barney was already throwing Ted's clothes around when Ted arrived.

"Watcha doing?" Ted asked.

"Stopping you," Barney answered.

"I can always buy more clothes," Ted said.

"Not American clothes," Barney replied.

"Barney, can you just chill out for a second?" Ted asked.

"I'll give you guys some privacy," Victoria said, heading towards the window to go up to the roof. When she was gone, Ted turned back to Barney.

"I know you're upset that I'm leaving, but I gotta do this. I've never done anything so wild and crazy like this before, and I really want to."

"You're making a big mistake," Barney said.

"If I stay here and she goes alone, we'll break up. I just know we will. Long distance relationships are hard, and I really like Victoria. I might even love her. I want to give this a chance. Please just be happy for me?" Ted begged. Barney stood there looking at his friend. Who was he to interfere when he could relate. If Robin moved away, he'd follow her, not that he'd ever admit that.

"All right. I'll allow it," he agreed.

"Um, you don't allow anything. It's my choice," Ted laughed.

"When it ends up bad, don't come running to me," Barney said, slapping Ted's back. He left then, heading back for the bar. He saw Robin there with Lily, and he couldn't help but smile. He turned to order a drink before Lily the Bloodhound could see. He sat down next to Robin when his scotch was made.

"I envy Ted a little," Lily said.

"Why's that?" Robin asked.

"He's living a dream. I didn't get to do that," Lily sighed.

"Isn't your dream Marshall?" Barney asked, confused.

"It is, but you know, when I was younger, I always thought I'd be a famous painter by now or something. It's just a realization that life changes," Lily said. Barney wasn't sure about what she was saying. It made him feel slightly worried.

"I love Marshall so much," Lily said. "I hope you guys know that."

"Now we do," Barney said. "Would it kill you to say it once in a while?" He hated to admit it, but Lily and Marshall's relationship was big in his eyes. They were a power couple. If anyone could survive life, marriage, kids, etc., it would be those two.

"I better go. Marshall wants me to take off his new suit," Lily winked.

"Ew," Robin said, wrinkling her nose.

"Nice," Barney commented. Lily ignored his high five hand. Then it was just the two of them.

"So," Robin started.

"So," he echoed.

"My place?" she asked.

"Hells yea," he nodded. They jumped up and hurried back to her apartment.

...

Barney was curled up behind Robin as she slept. He was still awake. He wasn't thrilled with Ted leaving, and no matter how hard he tried to justify the man's motive, he just couldn't. But, as he looked at Robin, he got to thinking that perhaps if it were him, he wouldn't see it any other way either. He felt something happening inside of his heart in this moment. It felt foreign and strange, but he kind of liked it. One of Robin's dogs came and curled up behind him, and he couldn't help but smile. He rested his head back onto the pillow and closed his eyes. He felt at home.

...

"I can't believe you're going," Lily said, hugging Ted hard. They were at the airport sending Ted and Victoria off. Barney was standing aside as Marshall, Lily, and Robin hugged him goodbye. He was last.

"Last chance to bail, bro," Barney said, hugging him.

"Nah. I think this'll work," Ted grinned.

"Keep in touch. Let us know when you get there. Don't talk to strangers!" Lily ordered, acting all motherly suddenly.

"I'll keep him safe and sound, and we'll call all the time," Victoria promised. Their flight was called, and they picked up their carry on luggage.

"Bye," Robin said, waving. Barney watched her. She seemed okay, not upset in any way. He wondered if she was truly over Ted. She caught his eye and smiled a little. He felt reassured.

"Hey, um, here's a farewell gift," Marshall said, handing him a long skinny wrapped box. "It just doesn't seem right to let you leave without it."

"Is that one of the swords from the wall?" Ted asked, surprised.

"Marshall! We are in an airport!" Lily hissed. "You'll get Ted arrested!"

"Oh damn," Marshall said, lowering the box in his hand. His plan had been foiled.

"You hang onto it," Ted told him. "I'll be back for it."

"Okay," Marshall agreed sadly. Ted and Victoria waved goodbye as they walked through the door and disappeared. Barney stood there feeling small suddenly. A part of their group was gone. How would things change because of it?

* * *

 **Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

Robin sat on her couch alone, thinking. Ted was gone. Victoria was gone. Ted was gone. She rubbed her legs anxiously. Ted was gone for two whole years. Imagine that. She snorted at herself. She was fine. Things with Ted didn't work out, and they never would. That was fine. She had Barney now, not that the world knew it yet. Whatever it was they had going right now, it could stay between them until they properly figured it out. Otherwise, Lily would probably lock them in a room until they did. Who needed that? Things were great just as they were.

 **A Week Later**

"Argh, Marshall!" Barney said, coming into her apartment and slamming the door. Robin jumped in surprise.

"Hey," she said. "What's wrong?" Barney kicked at the floor.

"He wants to quit."

"What? Why?"

"I dunno. Something about the environment. All I know is, he has to stay," Barney whined, flopping down onto her couch. He was immediately licked in the face by three of her dogs that could reach him.

"Down!" Robin ordered, and they scattered. She sat next to Barney's head. "So, is he gone?"

"No. I convinced him to stay because of the package," Barney answered.

"The package?"

"Yea. What Lily wants," Barney said logically. "The house, the marriage, the kids...Marshall can't give that to her without this job. He'll stay."

"You seem confident," Robin noted. She started playing with his hair. It was so damn soft.

"I am confident, Robin. You of all people should know that by now," he said suggestively.

"Oh it's on," Robin said, devouring his mouth with her lips. That's the way it had been the past week. Every second they had, they were with each other and doing it. They didn't talk about being boyfriend or girlfriend. They didn't talk about the future or anything else. They just lived in the moment.

...

"Oh look," Lily said, pulling up the card. "Another care package from Ted and Victoria." Robin was at the apartment with her as she had nowhere else to be.

"That's nice," Robin said. "How many is that now?"

"Three! Damn it. I haven't sent any."

"Doesn't this seem a little odd to you? I mean, you're not dating, so why the care packages?" Robin asked, curious.

"I don't know. I guess they're trying to keep in touch in a cute way. It's got Victoria written all over it," Lily said, reaching into the box. She pulled out a German magazine on architecture.

"Maybe not totally," Robin laughed.

"I have to send one don't I?" Lily asked, sighing.

"I'm afraid so. It'll just seem one sided if you don't," Robin pointed out.

"How are you holding up?" Lily asked, changing the subject.

"I'm fine," Robin answered. It was the truth. She was fine. Her feelings for Ted were simply not there anymore. It also helped he wasn't in her face every single day.

"Yea?"

"Yea. So, how's Marshall doing at work?" Robin asked. She was also good at changing the subject.

"He's not loving it, but he's holding out," Lily replied. "I worry about him. We are going to karaoke tonight with his coworkers."

"Have fun with that," Robin snorted. She hated karaoke.

"We'll do our song I'm sure," Lily said. "We even do a dance routine. Are you sure you don't wanna see it?"

"I'm good. Have fun," Robin smiled.

...

"Man, Marshall almost blew it with Lily," Barney said, stumbling into Robin's apartment. It was two a.m., and Robin had just gotten home from work.

"What happened?" she asked, shocked.

"He got all into it with the guys at work, and Lily was pissed. He was sticking to his guns, but then he got all soft and sang their song with her," Barney finished. He fell face first onto her couch.

"Well, I'm glad they're okay. My night was good, thanks for asking," Robin said.

"You're welcome," Barney said, muffled by the cushions.

"You're staying here tonight?" she asked. He nodded into the seat cushions. Robin hid her smile. The fact that he wanted to crash here drunk instead of home alone kind of meant something to her. It was sweet actually. She put her blanket over him and went to her bedroom to go to sleep. Around five a.m., he came and roused her from her sleep and started kissing her. Robin eagerly went along with what he wanted.

"I am amazed that no one has figured this out yet," Barney said afterwards. They were lying side by side staring at the ceiling.

"Me too. Lily is usually all up in this sort of business," Robin responded. She looked at him. "You think she's okay?"

"She's fine. I think Ted leaving has thrown her off her game. It works for us," Barney chuckled.

"Do you think we need to have that talk?" she asked. She winced inside. Would this scare him off?

"Soon," he answered. "I think we will soon."

"Okay," she agreed. Soon was good enough for her.

 **Less Than a Month Later**

Robin was sitting across from Barney when Lily and Marshall arrived at the bar.

"Guess what?" Marshall asked.

"You're coming to laser tag with me?!" Barney asked, excited.

"We're getting married in two months!" Lily exclaimed.

"Wow!" Robin said, surprised. "That's...soon."

"Yes it is, but it's Van Smoot," Marshall reasoned. "It's where we want to have the wedding, and it's so hard to get into."

"So, Lily, that's a lot to do in two months," Robin said.

"Yup, so everyone has a job to do," Lily said. "Robin, you're gonna come with me to the florist, help with invitations, and start the seating chart."

"Gee, it seems I'm doing a lot," Robin said.

"Yea, what do I get to do?" Barney asked.

"You don't get to do anyone at my wedding who is remotely related to me," Lily told him. "Which, I have to say, Barney you have been pretty quiet in the lady department lately. Everything okay?"

"Hmm? Oh, yea," Barney lied. "Banging a girl every night of the week." He had been, though. Robin. He was coming up a perfect month.

"He just finished telling me of this brunette that he banged so hard her contacts fell out," Robin added for good measure.

"Wow," Marshall said. Barney winked at him.

"Okay, so come on, come on, come on!" Lily urged, hustling Robin up off the booth and out the door. Robin dreaded every minute of this nightmare.

...

"I have to go to a prom with her," Robin complained to Barney. He was undressing for the day at his apartment while Robin was already in bed waiting for him.

"So?"

"I don't do proms. I'm not prissy enough," Robin sighed sadly.

"Oh please. Proms are for wieners anyway," Barney said.

"I never went to prom," Robin admitted. Barney looked at her.

"Really?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Hockey finals. They were always the same time. That and my father had this obsession with me being a son rather than a daughter, so arriving at a prom in a suit just wasn't appealing to me."

"You're hot in a suit," Barney noted.

"Thanks, but not at a prom," Robin groaned.

"So, to be clear, you don't want to go with Lily but you sort of do?" he asked.

"Yea."

"Makes perfect sense. Look, I can take you if you want. I'll be your date," he smiled.

"Really?"

"Yea. I loved prom. So many weaklings and freshly broken up relationships to pick from. It was great."

"This isn't that kind of prom, Barney," Robin said, concerned.

"I know," he nodded. He climbed into bed beside her. He enjoyed the idea of taking Robin to her first prom. He enjoyed it more knowing that it was him going with her and not someone else.

...

Robin stared after Lily as she ran from the gymnasium crying. She had just unleashed on this poor teenager about his dreams dying and never getting to live the life he wanted. She followed in pursuit. She hadn't seen Barney, who was still trying to sneak in after security denied him access.

"Hey, are you all right?" Robin asked after catching up with Lily.

"I can't believe I did that to that poor kid," Lily said, wiping her eyes.

"Maybe I'm crazy, but I can't help but think you're having second thoughts," Robin said.

"Not about Marshall, about me," Lily said. "I keep thinking about the girl I was ten years ago, and I can't figure out what happened to her."

"She met Marshall," Robin pointed out.

"Exactly. I had all these hopes and dreams, and I got with Marshall instead. He's given me different hopes and dreams, but I miss my original ones," Lily said. "I didn't travel, I didn't live the art life, and I didn't have my lesbian experience."

"You can still travel, you can still paint, and as for your lesbian experience," Robin broke off. She kissed Lily then quickly. "That's on me. Happy?"

"Yea," Lily said. "Thanks."

"Let's go back inside," Robin suggested. She caught sight of Barney just then.

"Did you guys just make out?" he asked, pointing.

"No. One kiss," Robin corrected.

"You totally made out," he said.

"No..."

"This is so hot! I want you right now."

"Barney! Not here," she hissed.

"All right fine. I can't get in, and neither can Marshall, so I'm going to do something crazy to get him inside to hear that song he so desperately needs to hear. Can you forgive me for not making your prom what you always dreamed it would be?" he asked.

"I heard some lousy music, got barfed on by my date, and I kissed a girl. Isn't that how all proms go?" Robin questioned.

"Yup pretty much. I'll see you later?" he asked, his meaning clear.

"Yes," she nodded.

"Great," he said. He took off then, catching the security guard's attention so that Marshall could slip inside unnoticed. Robin couldn't help but smile. He really did care about his friends.


	6. Chapter 6

**No, I haven't disappeared from the face of the Earth. I've just been busy with my other stories. Thanks for being so patient! Here's another chapter.**

* * *

Barney sat there feeling sorry that he couldn't run as fast as he used to when Marshall and Lily finally emerged from the gym.

"He's with us," Marshall said, and the security guard let Barney go. He dusted off his sleeves and snapped the crick out of his neck. Lily was on her phone while Robin looked on.

"Well? Was it worth it?" Barney asked Marshall. He grinned.

"Yea, man. We got the band."

"Nice."

They high fived each other. Then Marshall's face kind of darkened for a moment.

"What?" Barney asked, noticing. As quickly as it came, it left, and Marshall was grinning again.

"Ah, it's nothing. I think the stress is getting to Lily. She just hasn't seemed like herself lately."

"Weddings do that," Barney said, looking at Lily. She did indeed look a little stressed. He would tell Robin to have some girl time with her and see what was going on. He didn't realize that Robin had already talked to Lily about it.

 **A Week Later**

"This feels so weird," Marshall said as they all huddled around the laptop webcam to get a glimpse of Ted and Victoria and a cake in front of them.

"28, guys," Ted sighed. "My God, where did it go?"

"At least you're not single," Marshall pointed out.

"True," Ted nodded. Victoria gave him a tight side hug and a kiss on the cheek. Robin waited to feel something, but it didn't come. She felt Barney squeeze her leg, and she smiled.

"So, how are things?" Lily asked.

"Oh, you know, great," Ted grinned. "I am getting a little fat, though, with all the cakes and stuff Victoria is making for baking school."

"Just because I make them doesn't mean you have to eat them," Victoria said, exasperated, but she was smiling. "And it's a culinary institute not a 'baking school.'"

"So Marshall said your wedding got bumped up to a month and a half away?" Ted asked, changing the subject.

"Yup," Lily nodded. Barney noticed her expression when she said it. Marshall didn't notice.

"Are you guys coming?" Marshall asked hopefully.

"We'd like to," Ted answered, looking at Victoria. "But it might just be me if Victoria can't get away."

"I'd love to be there," Victoria chimed in. "I'll do my best."

"That's great," Lily nodded. Barney kept his focus on her while the conversation kept going. He made a note to talk to Marshall later.

...

"Hey," Barney said to Marshall once Lily and Robin were in the kitchen making dinner.

"What's up?"

"Is Lily okay?"

"Um, sure," Marshall nodded, squinting at him. "Why wouldn't she be?"

"I dunno. She just seems...not herself."

"It's the wedding. Once it's over, we will be able to breathe again," Marshall said.

"If you say so," Barney sighed. He still felt worried, and he didn't like to feel worried about his friends.

 **The Next Day**

"Oh, it is on like the break of dawn," Barney said.

"What is?" Robin asked in his ear. He had called her after seeing what Clark had done to his coffee.

"Clark got my latte."

"Then maybe you shouldn't have sent him that sandwich," she pointed out.

"Eh, he said, she said," Barney shrugged. "I need Marshall. I think this will help with the wedding stress."

"You said you weren't talking to him?" Robin said, confused.

"Oh, I will after this," Barney said, seeing Marshall coming to his office. "Talk to you later."

"Bye."

"You called me in here, so I'm assuming you want to talk to me again?" Marshall asked, coming into Barney's office.

"Can you taste this for me? I think they made it wrong," Barney said, handing over his cup. He couldn't believe it when Marshall obliged. That boy was pretty dumb sometimes.

"Tastes fine," Marshall said after.

"Yea. I thought so too until Clark sent me this," Barney said, showing him. Marshall gagged and spluttered.

"Barney!"

"Yea, it got me too," Barney said.

"Then why the hell did you make me taste it?!" Marshall demanded.

"Cos now you're in it," Barney grinned.

"I'm still pissed at you, but all right, Executive Mischief Consultant Marshall Eriksen reporting for duty!" Marshall cried. Then he grimaced. "Maybe we should mouthwash first?"

"Definitely," Barney nodded, feeling a little nauseous again.

...

"Hey, what's wrong?" Barney asked when he got to Robin's place and found her pacing.

"Lily is what's wrong," Robin answered. "She just called and told me that she went for an interview for an art fellowship in San Fransisco!"

"What?!" Barney exclaimed.

"And she got it," Robin finished.

"Oh my God. Is she...is she going?"

"She says no, but Barney, this is bad! She's having second thoughts! I don't know what to do," Robin said, getting panicked. "This is Ted's area, not mine!"

"Well, Ted isn't here, so we have to figure it out," Barney said. He felt very worried now.

"I'll talk to her again. She said she isn't going, but I feel like this is going to blow up in her face," Robin said.

"They'll work it out," Barney promised. "They always do."

"That's the thing, Barney," Robin said. "Marshall doesn't even know."

 **A Week Later**

"A camping trip?" Barney repeated. Robin nodded.

"Yea."

"And you're going?"

"It's a work thing."

"Is Sandy going?"

"Yes. He's my coworker."

Barney ground his jaw while trying not to feel jealous. The fact that he was even feeling jealous was interesting. Robin studied him while he sat in silence.

"I know it takes away from our weekend, but it's one night," Robin said, hugging him. Barney didn't say anything else.

...

"Hey, Barney," Ted said, answering the Skype call. "What's up?"

"I need to ask you something since you're the romantic one," Barney replied.

"Okay. What?"

"What does it mean to feel jealous about a girl spending time with another man?"

"Oh, wow," Ted said, leaning back and looking shocked. "Um, dude, are you jealous?!"

"I know, right?!" Barney exclaimed. "This is so not me."

"Who is she?"

"Not important," Barney dismissed. "Just tell me how to not feel jealous."

"Well, are you definitely boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Noooo..."

"Then you need to clarify that. If she knows you're a couple, then there's a less risk of her getting with someone else. Then there is more trust, which eliminates some of the feelings of jealousy."

"Not all of them?"

"It's something you work on."

"Okay."

"What is happening to everyone since I've left?" Ted asked himself more than Barney.

 **Later**

Barney found Robin getting coffee while waiting for her news cast to start.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Can we talk?" he countered.

"Uh, sure. I've got two minutes," she said, moving to a more private space.

"This whole camping with Sandy thing has made me think," he started. Robin held up her hand, stopping him.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I just...I want to clarify our relationship."

"I thought we weren't going to do that," Robin said, narrowing her eyes. "You know, no labels?"

"Well, I just think maybe we do need one," Barney told her.

"Oh my God," Robin said, getting it. "You're jealous!"

"No, no," he started.

"You are!" she crowed. "Wow. Barney Stinson jealous. I never thought I'd see that."

"Would you stop announcing it?" he asked. She crossed her arms, smirking at him.

"I have zero interest in Sandy," she said. "Okay? Stop worrying about it."

"Are you sure?"

"Barney!"

"Okay, okay. I'll stop worrying about it."

"Good," Robin said, moving in to kiss him.

"Robin!" someone shouted.

"Mmm gotta get to work," she said, pulling away. "I'll see you later."

"Okay," he said, watching her go. A part of him still really wanted to have the conversation with her. He had no idea what was happening to him.

...

"Just tell her," Ted insisted. Barney had his chin resting in his hands while Ted talked.

"It's not that easy. I don't think she wants the label."

"Who is this girl?" Ted asked again. "She has to be something amazing for you to want her to be your girlfriend."

"She is," Barney nodded.

"Why won't you tell me who she is?" Ted asked, suspicious.

"Because it's none of your damn business," Barney snapped back.

"All right. Chill," Ted said, holding up his hands. Barney rubbed his face hard with his hands.

"I'm going to tell her," he said finally. "Thanks, man."

"Hey, wait, how are Marshall and Lily doing?" Ted started. He knew that Lily was stressed out and having second thoughts. She had told him that much the other day. Since no one was saying anything else about it, Ted figured things must be okay again.

"Later!" Barney said, slamming down the laptop and going out the door.

...

It started to pour rain as Barney made his way to Robin's. He felt elated at this. That meant she wouldn't be going on that stupid camping trip after all. He buzzed her apartment, and she stuck her head out her window.

"Barney?" she asked.

"I need to talk to you!" he shouted.

"Come up!"

"No, come down!"

"It's raining..."

"Come down!"

"Fine," Robin caved, disappearing. Barney waited, and she appeared at the door.

"Robin," he started. "I really want you to be my girlfriend."

"Barney," she said, putting a hand to her mouth.

"I mean it."

"Barney, we've only been doing this for two months..."

"Almost three," he interrupted. "And maybe I'm crazy, but I really feel this is going somewhere. I want to be your boyfriend, Robin. You make me want to be that guy. I don't know what's happening to me, but I kinda like it."

Robin tilted her head at him, wondering what was happening here. Barney waited for her answer. He was putting himself out there big time, and he knew she knew it. She bit her lip. If he was asking, then he must really want it, and she kind of felt like she wanted it too despite her previous feelings about the subject. They were good together.

"I guess I'm crazy too, but okay," she finally said.

"Really?" he asked.

"Yes. Okay. Let's be boyfriend and girlfriend," she said, starting to smile. "God, I never thought I'd see the day where I'm Barney Stinson's girlfriend."

"I never thought I'd see the day where I wanted to be someone's boyfriend," Barney admitted. "But you do that to me, Robin. I can't explain it."

"Come here," she said, pulling him into her arms. They kissed in the rain for a while before going upstairs. After a while, they decided to go for a drink. Barney was still wet from the rain, but he didn't care. He was too happy. When they arrived at McLaren's, however, they both froze at the sight of Marshall sitting on the steps beside the bar crying.

"Oh no," Robin said as Barney rushed forward. Robin held the umbrella over them all.

"What happened?" Barney asked Marshall. He held up Lily's engagement ring, making Barney's heart drop to his feet.

"She left," he whispered.

"Oh God," Barney said. Robin sat down beside him and put her arm around him while Barney put his hand on Marshall's shoulder, not knowing what else to do. His eyes met Robin's, and they both knew that their happiness would have to be put on hold for a bit.


	7. Chapter 7

Robin and Barney stood in the kitchen looking through the doorway at Marshall, who was sprawled on the couch face down sobbing. It had taken a lot of convincing to get him back inside and into dry clothes.

"What are we gonna do?" Barney asked her. Robin didn't know. She felt her heart twist at Marshall's anguish.

"I can't believe she did this to him," Robin said instead. She also felt a lot of anger towards Lily. Couldn't she have just gotten married and then dabbled in the arts again? Why did she have to be single to do that? Then again, Robin didn't really know what transpired in the argument that Lily and Marshall had had earlier that evening. Marshall wouldn't really say.

"Ohhhhh GOD!" Marshall bawled. Both Robin and Barney flinched. Seeing their friend like this was terrible.

"We need to bring Ted in," Barney said.

"Ted's in Germany," Robin argued.

"He'll know what to do," Barney insisted.

"Fine, I'll message him," Robin said. She went into Ted's old room with Marshall's laptop. Marshall didn't even notice. After a few minutes, Ted's face came onto the screen.

"What's going on over there?" he asked immediately.

"Um," Robin started. She hesitated. She had no idea how to even start this.

"Why did Lily send me an email calling off the wedding?!" Ted demanded.

Well, that made it a whole lot easier.

"Lily left for art school and broke up with Marshall," Robin said quickly. Ted gaped at her before grabbing at his face with his hands.

"Are you serious?!" he exclaimed.

"Trust me, I wish I was joking," Robin sighed, resting her chin on her hand. "Ted, Marshall is a mess. Barney and I have no idea what to do."

"Let him cry it out, give him whatever he wants to eat, and do not, and I mean DO NOT, let him contact Lily," Ted finished.

"Robin!" Barney shouted, bursting into the door. "He's calling Lily!"

"Stop him!" Robin cried back, racing out to the living room. Barney tackled Marshall, reaching for the phone.

"No!" Marshall yelled. "No! I have to talk to her!" He and Barney wrestled for a moment until Robin went for the phone in his hand, and she pried it from his grip, hanging it up.

"No, you don't," Robin said, pocketing his phone. Barney released Marshall after a moment, and Marshall started to cry again.

"You'll only make things worse, man," Barney said.

"She should be the one to call you," Robin chimed in.

"She really left," Marshall whimpered. "I shouldn't have let her leave."

"Marshall, hey," Barney said, crouching in front of him. "You couldn't have stopped her."

"I could have," Marshall argued weakly. "I didn't have to give her the ultimatum."

"But you did," Robin confirmed. "And she took it, Marshall. She took it. What does that tell you?"

"I know," Marshall said, burying his face into his hands. Barney and Robin edged to the other room out of earshot.

"What are we going to do?" Robin asked. "He can't be left alone. He'll call her."

"I can stay here with him," Barney answered.

"Are you sure?"

"Yea. It's the least I can do."

"I can take some shifts too. I don't mind," Robin added.

"Okay. We can figure that out."

"Hey! Guys!" Ted's voice called. "What's going on?!"

"Is that Ted?" Marshall asked, lifting his head to look at them.

"Uh, yea," Robin nodded. Without another word, Marshall got up and went into the room with the laptop.

"Hey, buddy," Ted said as the door shut. Robin and Barney could hear Marshall telling Ted what had happened through his crying. Barney sighed.

"Well, that was a bit of a buzzkill on us, huh?" he said, laughing a little. He felt very bad for Marshall, though.

"It was, but hey, do we really need to tell the whole world right now?" Robin asked. She was still in a daze from Barney's need to have them labeled boyfriend and girlfriend. What was happening to Barney right now anyway?

"I guess not," he agreed, kissing her. He looked to make sure Marshall wasn't watching. Their relationship was still a secret anyway. Robin leaped back from Barney in fright when Marshall flung the door open and appeared.

"I'm going to bed," he announced. If he noticed how flustered both Robin and Barney were, he didn't say anything. They watched him trudge into his room and shut the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Robin said to Barney when they were alone again. "Good luck."

"Thanks," Barney nodded. He knew he had a bit of a challenge ahead of him. It was going to be one long summer.

 **A Month Later**

Robin knew Marshall was still hurting very badly, but he was at least putting on clean clothes again. He had lost it when Robin made pancakes one morning, so Robin and Barney agreed to the rule of no pancakes for a while. Now, Robin was standing at the airport waiting for Ted. It was decided that webcam visits just weren't good enough, so Ted came for a face to face visit. Victoria had been unable to come.

"Hey," Ted said, coming into view. He came over and hugged Robin. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," Robin answered. "Thanks for coming."

"I should have come sooner," Ted sighed.

"He's bouncing back and forth between the denial, anger, and depression stage," Robin told him as they walked to her car.

"I still don't understand why Lily did this," Ted said, confused. He put his bag into the trunk and got into the passenger seat.

"I don't either. I feel like it was a major case of cold feet that got tangled up into something else as a cover," Robin responded, putting the car into gear and driving away from the airport.

"Has anyone talked to her?" Ted asked. Robin shook her head.

"No."

"Has Marshall called her?"

"He's tried a few times, but we've been successful in disconnecting the call. I took her number out of his phone, so it's slowing him down at least."

"He's got it memorized, Robin," Ted scoffed.

"I know, but when he's drunk, it takes longer to dial it, thus giving us more of a chance to stop him," Robin shrugged. She had been taking shifts with Barney so often that they didn't really get much alone time. They were hoping to make up for it when Ted got there.

"Hey, do you know who Barney is dating?" Ted asked suddenly. Robin jerked the wheel slightly before correcting it, causing Ted to grab the dashboard.

"Robin!"

"Sorry," she said, laughing nervously. "Squirrel."

"Okay," Ted laughed back. "So, do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Know who Barney is dating?"

"Umm, no?" she said.

"He's gotten serious with someone," Ted mused. "A month ago he asked me about feelings of jealousy and telling a girl he wanted her to be his girlfriend. It must be serious because Barney is not the boyfriend type."

"Right?" Robin said, snorting. "Totally not."

"He must be really keeping it a secret," Ted said thoughtfully.

"He must be," she agreed. She didn't want to talk about it further. She was grateful when they finally got to Marshall's apartment. He was sitting up at least when they came into the door.

"Hey," Ted said. Marshall looked up at him before getting up and pulling Ted into a tight bear hug.

"You came," he said into Ted's shoulder.

"Of course," Ted nodded. Barney threw himself into the mix, not wanting to miss out on bro time.

"Are you moving back yet?" Barney asked hopefully.

"No, man. Things are going really well in Germany," Ted answered. "Sorry."

"It's all right," Barney sighed. Robin knew he was disappointed. She gave him a secret smile.

"Thanks for looking after him. I'll give you both a break for a while," Ted said when Marshall finally released him.

"Thanks, man!" Barney said, hurrying to the door. Robin stood still, knowing that if she left right after him, Ted would put it together. She had to let him get a head start.

"You're staying?" Ted asked, surprised.

"Oh, no," Robin shook her head. "I'm meeting someone for lunch."

"A date?" Ted asked, brow raised.

"No, no," Robin denied quickly. "Just a friend."

"Sure," Ted smirked.

"Bye," Robin said, waving. She didn't want him to pry any further. She found Barney in a cab, waiting for her. She launched herself onto him, kissing him hungrily as they drove away. It felt so good to finally have some alone time.

...

Hours later, Robin opened her eyes to find herself in Barney's bedroom. He was sleeping beside her. She took a moment to think about what had happened when they got here. They had ravished each other eagerly and urgently. Then, when it was over, Barney had looked at her seriously and said:

"Please don't leave me, Robin."

"I won't," she had promised.

Thinking about it now, she knew she had meant it. She didn't have any interest in finding someone new, which surprised her. Her phone rang then, waking up Barney and making her annoyed.

"Hello?" she said.

"Robin, where are you?" Ted asked. She sat up.

"Just at my place," she lied.

"Oh really? Cos I'm standing outside your door, and you're not answering," Ted said accusingly. Robin swallowed hard. Barney looked at her, concerned.

"Did I say my place? I meant Mei's place," Robin corrected.

"Mei?"

"My friend. The person I had lunch with."

"If you're on a date, just say so, Robin," Ted said, annoyed.

"What's going on?" Robin asked, changing the subject.

"I lost Marshall," Ted admitted.

"What?!" Robin exclaimed. She jumped out of bed and began tugging her clothes on. "How could you lose him? He was in your care for three hours..."

"I know! He bolted from me at the bar. I have no idea where he is," Ted finished. "I'm sorry."

Barney got dressed quickly too and grabbed his phone.

"Is he with Barney maybe?" Robin asked, shooting Barney a "go with it" look.

"No. Barney isn't answering my calls. I think he's with his girlfriend."

"Right."

"I'll meet you at the bar. Maybe Marshall came back," Ted sighed.

"Okay," Robin agreed. She hung up.

"He lost Marshall?" Barney asked, exasperated.

"Just get to the bar. Make something up," Robin said, kissing him quickly before rushing out of the apartment.

...

Robin found Ted sitting at their bar booth with Marshall sitting across from him.

"Thank God," she said, joining them. "Marshall! Where did you go?"

"I thought I saw Lily," Marshall said. "So I followed her."

"And?" Robin asked, feeling afraid. Would Lily come here and stalk him?

"It wasn't her," Marshall answered. "I gave the lady quite the scare."

"I'm sorry, Marshall," Robin said sympathetically.

"Hey, guys," Barney said, coming to join them by this point.

"Who are you dating?" Ted asked immediately.

"Barney's dating someone?" Marshall questioned, peering at Barney, who was going red in the face.

"Thanks a lot, Ted," Barney said.

"Oh, sorry," Ted winced.

"Who is she?" Marshall asked. "Since when do you date?"

"It's nothing!" Barney yelped. "God, leave me alone!"

Robin was grateful he was holding his ground. She didn't know how Ted or Marshall would take the news of them dating.

"You have to tell us eventually," Ted reasoned.

"And when that day comes, you will be the first to know," Barney promised.

"I miss Lily," Marshall lamented.

"I know, buddy," Ted said. Robin rubbed Marshall's arm comfortingly. Wherever Lily was, Robin hoped she was feeling ten times worse than Marshall was.

* * *

 **If you have time, I always appreciate a review :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you for the lovely reviews! Here's another chapter for you :)**

* * *

Barney had too many close calls with Ted. The guy was insistent on knowing who he was dating, and it was getting annoying. They were hanging out with Marshall (Robin was at work), but Marshall was more or less hovering between missing Lily and hating Lily. The cross between the two was: "I miss that horrible woman so much!" or "I hate that I miss her!" After a few hours of this, Marshall fell asleep, his legs on Barney's lap and his face on the pillow across Ted's lap, his nose squished against the arm of the couch. They looked at each other, knowing they were trapped for a while.

"So," Ted said. "Who are you dating?"

"Oh my God, Ted, will you give it a rest?!" Barney snapped quietly.

"Oh come on, Barney! It has to be someone pretty special for you to want to be their boyfriend! You gotta admit how weird this is," Ted finished.

"Have you and Victoria gotten engaged yet?" Barney shot back, trying to get the heat off of him.

"Well..." Ted said, his face going pink.

"Wait, have you?" Barney asked, surprised. He was only joking.

"I bought a ring," Ted admitted.

"Really? Wow that...that's great," Barney said. Ted nodded.

"I'm waiting for the right time to ask her. She's really busy right now with her school stuff. I was hoping she'd be able to come here with me so I could propose where we met, but it didn't work out."

"Are you going to move back here?" Barney wanted to know.

"I think so. I mean, Germany is great, but New York is greater, you know?"

"Yea."

"Do you think Robin is dating someone too?" Ted asked out of the blue. "She's being really weird as well."

"I think so, yea," Barney nodded vigorously.

"Really? Who?"

"I haven't met him. I think it's some douche from her work."

"Not Sandy Rivers," Ted groaned.

"Could be," Barney mused. "That sounds about right." The further he threw Ted off their trail the better.

"Aw, man. Robin said he was an idiot! Why would she date him?" Ted asked, horrified.

"I don't know. Maybe he's good in bed," Barney shrugged.

"Lily," Marshall moaned.

"Uh oh," Ted said, stiffening. If Marshall was having a sex dream about Lily, this was going to get awkward and gross real fast.

"No," Barney said, looking at Ted with a bit of fear in his eyes. "He wouldn't."

"He might," Ted replied.

"Lillllly!" Marshall moaned again, smiling now.

"Ah, God!" Barney yelped, jumping up. Ted did too at the same time. Marshall was flipped off of them and landed on the floor with a loud thud. He groaned and opened his eyes, looking up at his friends.

"What?" he asked them.

"Go to your own bed," Ted instructed.

"Oh, sorry guys. Was I doing it again?"

"Again?" Barney asked, incredulous.

"Nevermind," Marshall replied, getting to his feet. "Good night."

"Good night," Ted said. When he was gone, both Barney and Ted shuddered and shook.

"I need a drink," Barney stated. "Bar?"

"Sure," Ted agreed. He grabbed Marshall's cell phone and the landline phone just in case.

...

"This is great," Barney was grinning about an hour later. "We haven't hung out just you and me in forever."

"I know! I've missed it," Ted nodded.

"Really?"

"Yea, buddy."

"Awoohoo!" Barney said, downing his drink. Robin walked in then looking exhausted.

"Hey," Ted said, waving her in. "How was work?"

"Ugh. I swear if they make me say any more cheesy lines I might explode," Robin huffed, sitting down beside Ted. She didn't want to risk drunk Barney pawing at her and giving it away that they were dating.

"So why the hell are you dating Sandy Rivers?" Ted asked her, outraged. Robin gave him a blank stare until Barney kicked her under the table.

"Ah! Uh, because he's nice?" Robin said, covering.

"He's an idiot," Ted corrected.

"A nice idiot?" Robin stated.

"Okay, come on," Ted snorted. "You're not dating him. I can tell. I can read you like a book. I always have."

"Ohhh you got me," Robin laughed nervously.

"Ted got Victoria a ring!" Barney burst out, trying to digress.

"What?!" Robin exclaimed.

"Yea I did!" Ted beamed.

"That's great," Robin said, hugging him. "Congratulations!"

"I haven't asked her yet. She might say no. I hope she doesn't say no," Ted rambled. "If she says no I'll be really upset. If she says yes I'll be so happy! She really is amazing, and I love her. Man, she is just so smart, and funny. And sweet. And sexy. And..."

Barney winked at Robin. Getting Ted to do a monologue about himself was easy. It would distract him from the whole who is dating who thing. He was also drunk by this point, so once he got going, he wouldn't stop.

"You know what would be so hilarious?" Ted said after his ten minute talk about Victoria. "Is if you guys were dating each other! Right? I mean, you're both hiding who you're dating, so it adds up, you know?"

Robin and Barney both burst out into peals of fake, high pitched laughter.

"So hilarious, Ted!" Barney said, wiping at his eyes.

"Just downright ridiculous," Robin added. Ted looked at them both.

"Oh my God," he said. "You _are_ dating!"

"No, no, no," Robin said quickly.

"Absolutely not," Barney chimed in. He felt worried now. The only thing was, would sober Ted remember this in the morning? He desperately hoped not.

"No, it all fits," Ted went on. "It's happening at the same time. I mean, how is it possible that you're both dating other people so secretively at the same time? Wow. Just...wow. You guys. This is big."

"Is it really?" Barney asked. He had stopped drinking at this point. He had a little bit of a buzz going, but he needed to stay more sober than drunk right now since Ted was in interrogation mode.

"It is! When did it start? Are you in love? Have you had sex? What am I saying. Of course you've had sex," Ted said, smacking his forehead. "Does anyone else know? Does Marshall know? When did it start?!"

"Slow down, Ted," Robin encouraged, touching his elbow. "It's still fairly new."

"And no one knows but you," Barney added, pointing at him.

"It stays with me," Ted said, zipping his lips with his finger.

"Good."

"Wow, you two dating. I just can't picture it," Ted started again, resting his chin on his hand.

"Please don't," Robin begged.

"That's just weird, bro," Barney agreed.

"Robin...and Barney," Ted mused. "Robin and Barney. Barney and Robin! Wow."  
"Okay, I think that's enough for tonight," Barney said, getting up. "Let's go." Robin helped Ted to his feet, and he stumbled along with them back to the apartment. He crashed face first on the couch, and Robin and Barney stood there looking at him.

"Think he'll remember in the morning?" Robin asked, breaking the silence.

"I dunno. He had a lot to drink. This whole Marshall thing has been really getting to him," Barney answered.

"Let's hope not. I don't think sober Ted would be as easy going about this," Robin sighed. Barney put his arm around her and kissed the side of her head.

"Maybe not, but who cares? He can't tell us what to do."

"I know."

"Come on," he said. "Let's go home." They walked out hand in hand. Even if Ted knew when he woke up, Barney oddly felt some relief that it was out in the open.

 **A Few Days Later**

"He's stopped crying!" Ted exclaimed, coming into the bar where Robin and Barney were sitting. Barney let go of her hand instantly. Ted hadn't remembered figuring out they were dating when he woke up the day after that night. They had decided to keep it quiet still despite Barney feeling that it could be a good thing to have in the open. Then again, it might not be. He went back and forth on it.

"What? Seriously?" Barney asked.

"Yea! He went an entire day without crying! It's a miracle," Ted said, sitting down across from them.

"I never thought I'd see him stop," Robin commented. It had been really hard watching Marshall be so distraught. If he wasn't crying now, then maybe he was slowly getting better.

"I still don't trust him with phones," Ted said, putting the cell phone and the landline phone on the table.

"So, you're leaving tomorrow," Robin remembered.

"Yea," he nodded. "I miss Victoria. It's been great spending time with you guys again, though."

"When will you be back?" Barney asked.

"Next March," Ted answered. "Her year is up then."

"You'll come visit again before that, though, right?"

"Of course!"

"I have to get to work," Robin said sadly. "I'll drive you to the airport tomorrow morning, though."

"Okay. See you then," Ted nodded.

"Bye," Barney said to Robin. Without really thinking, she touched his cheek and smiled before walking away. Barney sat there frozen, hoping that Ted hadn't seen it. He moved his eyes over to Ted, who was looking down at his cell phone. He breathed in relief. Maybe when Ted came back they'd tell him, if they were still together.

"Let's drink!" Ted exclaimed, putting his phone down.

"All right!" Barney responded.

 **The Next Morning**

"You ever feel like you're forgetting something?" Ted asked Robin as they pulled into the airport.

"Like what?" Robin asked.

"I dunno. I just...I feel like I'm forgetting something."

"You triple checked the apartment for all your stuff. I watched you do it," Robin told him, exasperated.

"No, no, not like physical stuff. I'm talking about something I heard or found out. I just can't remember what," Ted mused. Robin felt her heart rate pick up.

"I'm sure it's nothing," she assured him.

"Maybe," he said. "Well, time to go I guess." He got out of the car and pulled his bags out from the back. Robin got out as well. Ted spied something on the floor of her car, something that was really familiar. He stared at it. Wasn't that...?

"If you keep stalling, you'll miss your flight," Robin said to him. He pulled his head out of the car and looked at her. "What?"

"You're dating Barney," he said almost accusingly.

"What?" Robin asked, laughing nervously.

"You are!"

"Why would you even think that?" she asked. Ted leaned back into the car and pulled out Barney's tie. He waved it in her face.

"Barney's tie? So he had a ride with me," she snorted. "Why does that mean we're dating?"

"Barney never leaves his clothing behind ever," Ted said. "They are like his children. If his clothes are in your car, then he really trusts you, and if he really trusts you, then you're more than just friends."

"You're crazy, Ted," Robin scoffed.

"Robin! Don't lie to me," Ted said, pointing his finger at her. She swallowed.

"Okay, fine. We're dating."

"How long?"

"Since you left. Well...sort of before that," she winced.

"And you didn't tell me?"

"We didn't tell anyone, Ted."

"Why? Are you ashamed?"

"No! We just...we didn't want the pressure."

"What pressure?"

"From you! You put this pressure on every relationship whether it's yours or someone else's! We just wanted to see how it would go without anyone knowing."

"Real nice, Robin. I didn't realize you couldn't trust me, that I was a horrible person."

"Ted, don't. It's nothing to do with you. It's my life."

"Clearly," Ted said, grabbing his bags and moving to the building.

"Ted! You figured it out a few days ago at the bar, and you weren't this upset," Robin said. Ted stopped and turned.

"I figured it out, and you guys let me forget it? That hurts, Robin. That hurts more than anything." He started walking again.

"Ted!"

"Goodbye, Robin," he called back without looking. Robin crossed her arms, hugging herself tightly. Ted was upset. She knew it. She reached for her phone to tell Barney. She worried that this might make Ted never want to come back.

* * *

 **Duh, Duh, Duhhhh. Now Ted knows. How soon before Marshall finds out? Stay tuned! ;)**


	9. Chapter 9

Why did this bother her so much? Robin was still thinking about Ted's reaction to her not telling him she was dating Barney. What was the big deal anyway?

"He'll get over it," Barney had said. "It's not his life anyway, it's ours."

Robin just wished she could let it go. It had been over a month since Ted had left, and it was radio silence from his end. Fall was just upon them, and she wondered if he was still coming home for Christmas. She was walking down the street when she stopped suddenly, staring at the woman in front of her.

It couldn't be, could it? She blinked.

" _Lily?!_ "

The woman turned and saw her, and her face broke into a huge grin.

"Robin!"

"Oh my God, Lily," Robin said as Lily came to hug her tightly. Robin automatically hugged back, but she felt something inside of her that she didn't know how to explain. It felt a little like annoyance and a tad like outrage. Did Lily just know that Marshall had finally been better and a little happier and decided to come shatter him again?

"How are you?" Lily asked. Robin made the decision right then to talk about Marshall as minimally as possible.

"I'm...great," Robin answered.

"Good, good," Lily bobbed her head. Robin had a feeling she was bursting to ask about Marshall but was holding back. Robin decided to let her stew.

"Yea, everything's great. Did you hear Ted bought an engagement ring for Victoria?" Robin asked, throwing the ball way into left field. Barney had told her about that one. She fought the urge to write and tell Ted how "mad" she was he didn't tell her about it. What right did he have to be mad at her when he was keeping things to himself too?

"What?! No, I didn't. I haven't heard anything about anybody since I have been gone," Lily answered. The hint was glaringly obvious.

"I'm assuming he's asked her to marry him. We're not talking," Robin went on. Lily looked at her concerned now.

"Why not?"

"Oh, we had a little spat, and he's mad at me, but I'm sure he'll come around eventually."

"What about?"

"Stupid, boring stuff," Robin answered. "So, how was San Francisco?"

"Oh, it was wonderful! Best decision I've ever made," Lily gushed. "Every experience was life altering. The art was astounding. The people were sensational. It was incredible."

 _Blah, blah, blah,_ Robin thought. _Your fiance was shattered into a million pieces and barely got dressed for weeks, but good for you for having such an amazing time away from him._

She smiled instead.

"That's great!"

"I'm actually on my way to look at an apartment. You wanna come with me?" Lily asked.

"Um, sure," Robin nodded. She felt her phone vibrate and saw a message from Barney.

 **Taking Marshall out again tonight. He's really into the idea of dating again.**

"Oh, God," Robin gasped.

"What?" Lily asked.

"Some random guy just sent me a pic of their junk," Robin lied quickly.

"Really?" Lily snorted with laughter. She moved to look.

"Oh, I deleted it!" Robin cried, shoving her phone away and laughing almost manically now. "Come on, let's go see this apartment."

Yes, Marshall had gone out with Barney the other night, but she hadn't thought much of it as he had been reluctant to go. The fact that he wanted to go again scared her. Was Marshall moving on from Lily already?

...

That night, Robin paced her apartment until she heard Barney knock at her door. She opened it.

"I feel like I live here," he joked. All her dogs herded towards him to be petted. He obliged.

Robin didn't know how to start. Barney, however, beat her to it.

"Marshall did so great tonight," he bragged. "He got three numbers. There was this other guy who kept stealing the girls from him, though, which I get it. If I was single, I'd probably have taken them from Marshall too."

"Really?" Robin asked, crossing her arms.

"But I'm not," Barney reminded her. "That life is over for me, remember?"

"I know," Robin smiled. She just liked to be reminded sometimes.

"It was a little weird but kind of nice to see Marshall out there again, you know?" Barney mused. Robin sucked in her breath. It was now or never.

"Lily's back," she blurted out. Barney froze and gaped at her.

"Did you just say...?"

"Uh huh," Robin nodded.

"She's back," Barney echoed. He sat down on the couch.

"She didn't ask me a single thing about Marshall," Robin went on, sitting beside him. "We went looking at apartments today."

"We can't tell Marshall," Barney said. "Not yet. I could barely stand watching him be so hurt this summer."

"He's going to see her eventually," Robin reasoned.

"And he was finally scoring chicks again," Barney groaned.

"Who was scoring chicks again?" Lily asked, coming into view. She had been taking a shower.

"Gah!" Barney yelped.

"Oh yea, and she's staying here until she finds an apartment," Robin added.

"Who is scoring chicks again?" Lily repeated.

"Marshall," Robin answered. Lily gave Barney a look then, one that Robin couldn't decipher.

"He is," Lily said, sounding deflated.

"Yup, I took him out myself," Barney nodded. "He's got some phone numbers."

"Oh my God," Lily started to bawl.

"Oh, no," Robin panicked. She didn't do well with criers.

"I miss Marshall so much!" Lily sobbed. "This summer was the worst experience of my life! All I wanted was to come home, but I was so embarrassed and ashamed of myself that I just couldn't."

"Thank you," Barney said, standing up. Robin looked at him, shocked.

"For what?" she asked, incredulous. Lily was still crying.

"I needed to hear that from her to know she's serious," Barney explained. He went over to Lily and put his hands on her shoulders. "You made a terrible mistake leaving Marshall."

"I know I did!" she cried.

"You almost killed him."

"I'm sorry!"

"You need to respect whatever decision he makes regarding the two of you," Barney ordered.

"Okay!"

"Now, sit," Barney said. Lily sat.

"That was really unlike you," Robin noted.

"Yea, well, a lot of things are unlike me lately," Barney replied.

"I came back," Lily sniffed, wiping at her face. "You came and told me to, so I did."

"Excuse me?" Robin asked, astounded. She looked at Barney.

"All right, all right," Barney said. "You got me. I couldn't take Marshall being devastated anymore or going out to meet chicks, so after the other night, I went to tell her to come home, that she was going to mess up the best thing that ever happened to her if she didn't. I even gave her a plane ticket back. I can't keep paying my guy to steal Marshall's dates; he charges a lot!"

"I can't believe you did that," Robin said. She resisted the urge to hug and kiss him. Lily still didn't know about them.

"Well...Lily and Marshall's relationship has always inspired me," Barney said, never taking his eyes off of her. "If I could ever get that, then I'd be the luckiest man alive."

"You guys are totally doing it," Lily said then. Her tone was a little accusing.

"No..." Robin started.

"I don't care, Robin," Barney cut her off. "Let the whole damn world know if they want to know. I've changed so much this summer just by being with you, and although it scares me and is unknown to me where to go from here, I do know one thing for sure that will never change, and that is the fact that I love you, Robin Scherbotsky."

Lily gasped and covered her mouth with her hands.

"Oh," Robin said, tearing up. She felt weak in the knees. Were they ready for that? Was it real? She didn't even know that Barney could love anyone.

He was looking at her intensely, and Robin could see the fear in his eyes at the idea of her rejection. He was baring his soul to her, and she had an idea that it was the first time he had ever done that with a woman.

"I love you too," Robin replied. It was the truth. In the last month, she had felt it coming but didn't want to say it first.

"Awww," Lily said, crying again. "I just thought you were having sex. I didn't know you were in love."

"I am just as shocked as you are," Barney told her.

"Come here," Robin said, pulling him to her then and kissing him.

"Oh, oh God," Lily said when it became heated. "I'll just, uh, leave shall I?" She hurried to the door and shut it firmly behind her.

...

Barney loved her. Robin couldn't stop grinning about it. Barney Stinson was capable of loving again, and she had somehow managed to help him get there. Out of everyone he had been with, Robin couldn't believe there was something about her that was better than all of them. She approached Marshall's apartment door then. She was checking in on him as well as giving him the news about Lily. She had thought about it, and she didn't want him to get ambushed.

"Hey," she said, entering. Marshall looked up at her.

"Oh, hey."

"I heard you struck out again last night," Robin sympathized.

"It's all right. I think it's for the best anyway. I'm not ready."

"Marshall," Robin said after waiting a beat. "There's something you need to know."

"I already know," Marshall interrupted. "I ran into Lily last night outside the bar."

"Oh. I'm sorry we didn't give you a head's up."

"It's all right. I had this feeling she was back in New York, you know? We were very connected to each other at one time."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm good actually. We are not getting back together right now. I've been through way too much to just do that. We will see each other as friends for now," he finished.

"I'm glad you're okay," Robin smiled, unsure of what else to say.

"As for you," Marshall said, pointing his finger at her. Her smile quickly vanished. Uh oh.

"What about me?"

"You and Barney are in love?! Why didn't you guys tell me you were dating?"

Damn that Lily.

"We...we didn't want to tell anyone because we didn't know where it was going and didn't want any pressure from anyone," Robin said.

"You still could have told me," Marshall said. "I would have understood. You guys hid that from me all this time? I can't believe it."

"We didn't want to rub our new relationship in your face either," Robin went on. "It was just easier to hide it."

"Well, I have to say I can't believe Barney can even love someone. I mean, that's really amazing. Does Ted know?"

"He knows we're dating. That's it," Robin explained. "That's why he's mad at me."

"Because you're dating Barney? I'm pretty sure he's over you, if that's what you're thinking. He proposed to Victoria, and she said yes."

And Ted hadn't even told her or Barney. That was low. Robin swallowed. Was their friendship over?

"He was mad that he figured it out when he was drunk and that we didn't tell him when he was sober to remind him."

"I'm sure he's fine now," Marshall reassured her.

"Then why hasn't he talked to me? Why didn't he tell me or Barney that he got engaged?"

Marshall had no idea how to answer that, so he just shrugged.

"I should get to work," Robin said, changing the subject. "I'll see you later."

"He's coming home for Christmas," Marshall called after her.

"Oh. Okay."

"He'll be over it by then. I know Ted."

"Thanks, Marshall," Robin smiled sadly. Maybe Ted would be over it, but Robin wasn't sure if she would be. She did miss her friendship with Ted at times, though. As she headed to work, she wondered if Ted's reaction was more than just because she hadn't told him about dating Barney. Was he rushing into marriage to get his mind off of her? No. She shook her head. No, he had moved on from her a long time ago, and even so, she was in love with Barney. There was no more feelings or thoughts for Ted. That chapter was over. And Marshall was right. Ted would be over it and ready to be friends again by Christmas. She just had to convince herself that she would be ready by then too.


	10. Chapter 10

It was Christmas Eve, and Barney had no idea what to get Robin. Talk about waiting til the last minute. It was driving him nuts. He wanted to give her something to show her how much she meant to him, but what that was exactly, he couldn't seem to figure it out.

"Argh!" he exclaimed, making Marshall jump in his seat. They were at the bar together, just the two of them. Ted was flying in that day, and Marshall was going to pick him up at the airport. Barney didn't know how Ted would be around them now ever since finding out about their relationship. He hadn't talked much to Barney since.

"What?" Marshall asked, patting at his chest to calm his now racing heart thanks to Barney's sudden outburst.

"I don't know what to get Robin for Christmas," Barney sighed.

"Really? What about a puppy?" Marshall suggested. It was kind of a joke since Robin already had so many dogs.

"I've already thought about it," Barney admitted. "But thanks."

"Women like jewelry," Marshall said.

"Robin's not into the girly stuff," Barney explained. Not that he noticed anyway.

"Well, then I'm stumped."

Barney drummed his fingers on the table, thinking. He and Robin hadn't really talked about Christmas anyway. It was like they knew it was there but thought that if they didn't discuss it, then it would slide by without being noticed.

"Should I get Lily something?" Marshall asked, breaking into his thoughts.

"I don't know. Should you?"

Lily and Marshall were still not back together, much to Barney's annoyance. He had figured they would be by now.

"I don't really know," Marshall admitted. "We are in such a weird place right now. Would a gift make it weirder?"

"You're still friends, right?"

"Well...yea."

"Friends get friends gifts. I think it's okay," Barney shrugged.

"Okay. Yea," Marshall said, nodding vigorously. "Yea! Friends give other friends gifts. It won't be weird."

"Not at all."

"Thanks, man."

"Okay, now that we've got your problem covered," Barney started. "Help meeee!"

"Just think about Robin and what she loves and get her something that reflects that," Marshall suggested.

"That is of no help to me whatsoever," Barney groaned. "She has a lot of things she loves. I need to narrow it down!"

"Can't help you there, buddy. Sorry," Marshall said, finishing his soda. He stood and put his coat on. "I gotta go get Ted. I'll see you later."

"Yea, yea," Barney said, waving his hand in the air as Marshall left.

What was he going to get Robin?!

...

"Just get her something related to hockey," Lily suggested when Barney asked her. She was working at a restaurant for now, trying to stay afloat until she got a teaching job again. Barney was following her around as she cleaned the tables. It was before the dinner rush, so it was quiet in the restaurant.

"That's too lame. I want to get something grand."

"Then I can't help you," Lily replied.

"What are you getting Marshall? Maybe it will spark an idea for me," Barney said. Lily froze, looking at him. Barney had a bad feeling inside that he had just freaked her out.

"What, what's that look?" he asked, nervous.

"I gotta get Marshall something," she said, beginning to panic. "Oh my God! What am I going to get him?!"

"See? This is what I've been feeling all day," Barney pointed out.

"Should we get each other a gift?" Lily asked.

"He's getting you one," Barney answered.

"How do you know?"

"He told me."

"Oh, God! I don't know what to get him! We're not even together..."

"You're still his friend. Friends give other friends gifts," Barney said, feeling deja vu suddenly.

"You're right! Crap. I gotta figure this out," Lily said, rushing off.

"Wait, so you're not going to help me?" Barney called after her. She didn't respond. He sighed, going out onto the street and feeling bad. Why couldn't he figure this out?

...

"Mom? What should I get her?" Barney asked. It was his last resort. If his friends wouldn't help him, then he'd resort to his mother. Loretta looked at him, frowning.

"You haven't gotten her a gift yet?!"

"No," he said, hanging his head.

"Dude, it's Christmas Eve," James said pointedly. They were putting the finishing touches on Loretta's Christmas tree. James had come home for the holiday. Barney had told them about Robin after he had told her he loved her a while back. Loretta had been thrilled to hear Barney was somewhat normal.

"I know!" Barney yelped. "I'm stuck." He sat with his head in his hands. Loretta sat down beside him and rubbed his back comfortingly.

"A gift comes from the heart," she said. "What does your heart tell you to give her?"

Barney sat there, thinking hard. Between Marshall's suggestion and his mother's, an idea came to him out of nowhere, and the more he thought about it, the less crazy it became.

"You're a genius," he said, kissing his mother's cheek and jumping to his feet.

"Oh, you're leaving?" she asked, disappointed.

"I gotta get my gift before everything closes!" he called over his shoulder, disappearing outside.

"He's not gonna give her a photo of his heart, is he?" James asked. Loretta snorted in laughter, and soon they were both laughing together. Barney could be a little eccentric at times with things. She wouldn't put it past him.

...

Barney was sitting at the bar feeling smug when Marshall and Ted arrived. He stiffened, unsure of what mood Ted was going to be in.

"Hey," Ted said, waving and smiling at him. Barney felt himself relax.

"Ted!" he cried, getting up to hug him. Ted hugged him back. "How are you?"

"Great! Victoria's just upstairs taking a nap. The flight wore her out."

"She came too? Great!"

"Yea. We, uh, we actually decided to move back early," Ted said.

"Really?! Why?"

Marshall was barely hanging on in the background. He didn't do well with secrets that were exciting.

"Oh, you know. It's just time," Ted said vaguely.

"Victoria's pregnant!" Marshall burst out. He was vibrating with happiness.

"Marshall!" Ted said, outraged.

"Whaaaaaat?!" Barney exclaimed. He stared at Ted, who was blushing now.

"Yea. It's kind of a shock to us, but we're really happy."

"Wow," Barney said, feeling overwhelmed. "Wow...just, wow."

"Is Robin coming tonight?" Ted asked, looking around. "I kinda feel bad about the way we left things. I'm sorry for freaking out about you guys."

"It's fine," Barney dismissed.

"I'm sure it's not," Ted argued. "I hurt Robin. She's bound to be mad at me."

"I will let you two figure that out," Barney said. "As for you and me, we're good." He didn't hold grudges for very long anyway.

"Thanks, man," Ted said, grinning.

Marshall sat smiling at his two best friends. He was glad they were back on good terms, not that they had been on bad terms per say. They just didn't know how to reach out to each other after so long. Until now.

"What did you get Lily?" Barney asked Marshall.

"I'm not telling."

"Aw, come on!"

"What did you get Robin?" Marshall asked, putting it back on him.

"If you're not telling, then I'm not telling."

"Fine."

It was all in good fun. Barney and Marshall grinned at each other after.

"It's gonna be a great day," Barney said, looking forward to it.

...

"I'm getting rid of the dogs," Robin said to Barney that evening. He stopped scrolling through his phone and looked at her, surprised.

"What?"

"Yea," she nodded, crying a little. "It's time. They need to have a big field to play in. Being cooped up in this apartment is not healthy for them. I've been thinking about it for a while now."

"Aw, Robin. I'm sorry. I know how much you'll miss them," Barney said, pulling her into a hug. She had her hand on one of the dogs, rubbing their head slowly.

"It's not fair of me to keep them here," she said, sniffing and wiping her eyes. She hated crying.

"Where are they gonna go?"

"My aunt has a farm. I'll drive out tomorrow and take them. I know it's Christmas, but it'll be nice to see her for a short visit. I know Lily is doing dinner at Marshall's."

"I'll go with you," Barney promised.

"Okay," she smiled sadly. "Thank you."

He hugged her tightly again.

"Did you see Ted?" she asked him after she collected herself. He nodded.

"He's fine. He said he was sorry for getting upset at you."

"Well, he can say that to my face."

"Robin, he means it," Barney said.

"I still need to hear it for myself."

"Okay."

Robin rested her head on his shoulder then. Barney knew she was dreading the face off with Ted, but it needed to happen in order for them all to move on. Barney did not like their group being apart like this. Now, if only he could get Marshall and Lily back together.

 **Christmas Day**

Robin was out walking her dogs for the last time when she saw Ted. She stopped abruptly, making her dogs whine and look up at her, puzzled.

"Hey," Ted said. His hands were in his pockets, and he looked sheepish.

"Hi."

"Out for a walk," Ted noted. He felt so lame suddenly.

"Yea. It's a goodbye walk."

"What?"

"I'm taking them to my aunt's farm after. They need the space. The city isn't for them," Robin explained.

"Oh. That'll be hard."

"Yup."

They looked at each other then, and Robin felt a little angry inside. Was he really going to pretend that things were fine?

"Look, about the last time I saw you..." Ted started. She held up her hand to stop him.

"You were an ass," she said.

"I know."

"You had no right to go off on me like that."

"I know."

"So why? Why did you get so mad?"

"I was mad because you guys are my best friends, and the fact that you felt you couldn't tell me you were dating made me feel like maybe I wasn't that close of a friend, you know? I made it about me when I should have been happy you and Barney found something in each other."

"Ted, you are our best friend, but we just wanted it for ourselves, you know? It was nothing against you."

"I know that now. I just didn't feel that way then."

"Well, you not talking to me made me feel that you were done with our friendship," Robin said. She gripped the leashes tightly then, feeling emotional.

"I'm not. I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I just...I didn't know what to say. Then days turned into weeks, and...you know."

"An 'I'm sorry' would have been a good place to start," she pointed out.

"I'm sorry," Ted said sincerely. "I am."

"Okay. Apology accepted."

They smiled at each other then, and Robin felt better. She had her friend Ted back. Things were good.

"Victoria is pregnant," Ted told her then. Robin's jaw fell down.

"What?! Oh my God, Ted! Congratulations!"

"Thanks," he beamed. "We're very excited."

"When is she due?"

"May."

"And you're engaged?"

"Yea. We're thinking of getting married before the baby comes."

"Wow, Ted. That's great."

The dogs started to pull then, and Robin knew she had to keep walking.

"I'll see you at dinner," she said. "I'm sorry. I gotta keep moving before they get too antsy."

"Okay. Good luck," Ted told her. He gave her a small hug before letting her continue on her way. At least things were finally good between them again.

...

Barney drove. He looked over at Robin every now and then, who had tears in her eyes. The littlest dog was in her lap with the rest in the backseat. They seemed to know something big was going to happen.

"You sure you wanna do this?" he asked.

"I'm sure," she answered.

The rest of the drive was fairly quiet. When they got to the farm, Robin got out and let the dogs out after her. They raced off sniffing and panting excitedly. Robin's aunt met them in the driveway.

"Hi, honey," she said, hugging Robin.

"Thanks for taking them," Robin said thickly into her shoulder. Barney stood to the side, feeling unsure of what to do.

"Come and visit them anytime, okay?" her aunt said.

"I will."

"You have plans for dinner?"

"I do."

"Good, good. It'll take your mind off of things. I'm going out soon ourselves. Come in and have a tea before you drive back."

"Okay," Robin agreed. They went inside, and Barney listened to Robin's aunt tell him tales of Robin from when she was younger. He rested his chin on his hand, listening avidly. He loved hearing young Robin stories.

"Shoot. It's almost three. I gotta get going," Robin's aunt said after a couple of hours. "My partner's family is very much an on time kind of family, you know? She's already over there helping."

"I get it," Robin nodded.

"It was lovely to see you," she went on, giving Robin another hug. "And nice to meet you." She hugged Barney.

"Likewise," Barney grinned.

"Come back soon," Robin's aunt urged. They stepped outside, and all the dogs hurried over to Robin. Barney and Robin's aunt gave each other a knowing look, stepping aside to give Robin a moment to say goodbye. Barney felt a part of his heart break as he watched Robin hug and kiss her dogs goodbye, crying and patting them and telling them she still loved them, that she was leaving them because she loved them. She stood quickly after a bit and went to the car. Robin's aunt held the dogs back so they wouldn't chase after her. Barney got into the driver's side and started the car. Robin looked out the window at her dogs, who were barking now.

"You sure?" he asked again.

"Yes. Go before it hurts even more," she begged. He put the car in drive, and Robin turned to look back at her babies before they rounded the corner and disappeared from sight. Barney took her hand in his and squeezed it tightly as they drove on and she cried. The one thing Robin couldn't get out of her mind was that Barney was there with her. Barney cared about her. He'd be there for times like these again in the future, whatever that looked like. There was something comforting in that despite her sadness. It was something she hadn't realized she had wanted, but she was glad she had it from Barney.

...

"You sure you're up for dinner?" Barney asked as they got ready to go to Marshall's place.

"Yea. I can't hide in bed over dogs," Robin answered. It had been a sad drive back to the city, but she knew she had to buck up. Big girls didn't cry, especially over something that was really nothing. She'd get through dinner and cry later.

"Okay," Barney said, feeling that she was putting on a brave face but didn't want to push it. They headed over to Marshall's, where they were greeted by Ted. They had missed Ted and Lily having a row about her leaving Marshall, but the two of them had worked through it and were now on good terms again. It had been tense for a while, though, since the night before when Ted got into it with her.

"How are you doing?" he asked, hugging Robin.

"I'm okay. They'll be happier there," she answered, reassuring herself more than him. Victoria came to hug her next.

"I'm so sorry," she said. "But it is good to see you."

"Yes, it is," Robin agreed. "And congratulations!"

"Thank you," Victoria beamed. Robin then went to help Lily in the kitchen while the others sat around and chatted.

"I didn't get Marshall anything," Lily said almost tearfully as she pounded on the potatoes to mash them.

"What?" Robin asked.

"I didn't know what to get him, and then I ran out of time. I'm the worst person ever," Lily moaned.

"He'll understand, Lily. You guys have had a rocky last few months anyway."

"All the more reason to have gotten him something," Lily pointed out.

"Let me," Robin said, taking the masher away from her before it went through the bottom of the pot. Lily patted her hands on her apron anxiously.

"It's just...I wanted this to be perfect. Christmas," Lily said. "It's his favorite holiday."

"Well, you decorated the place up nicely. That could be your gift to him," Robin suggested.

"It's not enough."

Robin didn't know how else to comfort Lily in that moment, but Lily was no longer paying attention to Robin, which Robin was fine with. She was lost in her own thoughts anyway. Before long, it was dinner time.

...

"Gift time!" Ted exclaimed as they sat around the living room after dinner. Clean up was put off for now. They were too full for that.

"Oohhh yes!" Barney chimed in. Lily was twisting her hands in her lap.

"I didn't get anyone anything," she said, her face pained. "I just...I was so focused on everything else that Christmas just kind of snuck up on me without me realizing."

"You cooked dinner and decorated the apartment," Marshall pointed out. "I think that's gift enough for us, right guys?"

They all agreed, and Lily's face relaxed a little, but Robin knew she was still disappointed with herself. The others exchanged gifts with each other. Some were gag gifts, some were cute, but they all appreciated the others thinking of them.

"Okay," Marshall said, facing Lily. He handed her a small rectangular wrapped gift.

"Oh, Marshall," Lily said. "You shouldn't have, especially since I didn't..."

"Just open it, Lily," Marshall ordered, cutting her off. He was smiling, though. She opened it gingerly, and her eyes welled up when she saw what it was. Barney was craning his neck to see.

"Did you do this?" she asked Marshall, holding up the small canvas painting of a heart on it.

"I did," he nodded.

"What does it mean?" she questioned.

"It's my heart, Lily," Marshall replied. "I've been really thinking lately, and I decided that I'm ready to give you my heart back, if you want it."

Lily was crying now, but she was also nodding.

"Yes, Marshall. Yes. I want your heart back. I won't ever let it go again," she said.

"And that response is your Christmas gift to me," Marshall told her. She threw herself into Marshall's arms then. Barney burst into tears, making everyone look at him.

"It's just so beautiful," he said, emotional. He hugged Marshall and Lily while they were still hugging each other.

"You guys," Ted said, his own eyes a little wet. "That was amazing."

"It really was," Victoria nodded, openly crying too. She reached for Ted's hand. Robin was glad Ted had found someone. He deserved to be happy.

"Okay, someone else go," Lily said, sitting on Marshall's lap now as he snuggled against her.

"Here," Robin said to Barney. He opened her envelope, studying it.

"Holy crap!" he exclaimed.

"What is it?" Ted asked.

"She entered us into the Armageddon Laser Tag Tournament!" Barney said excitedly. "This is awesome!"

"It's where it all started for us," Robin told him. He didn't know what to say, so he pulled out his small gift for her and handed it to her. She opened it slowly, and she stared at it.

"Barney," she said, picking up the key. "Is this...is that...?"

"The key to my apartment," Barney confirmed. "Robin, I love you, and I want to spend every waking moment with you. I would love it if you'd move in with me."

"Oh my God," Robin breathed. The others stared in shock, waiting for her response. If someone had told Robin that Barney would tell her he loved her and ask her to move in with him, she would have called that person insane, but here it was happening.

"I know it seems crazy," Barney started.

"No, it's not," Robin cut him off. "We've been dating long enough, and I really want to be with you all the time too. So, yes. I will move in with you."

"Awww!" Lily gushed as Barney kissed her.

"This feels like a happy ending," Ted noted. Barney and Robin looked at him.

"What do you mean?" Robin asked him.

"I dunno. Marshall and Lily are back together. Victoria and I are engaged and having a baby, and you guys are moving in together. It's nice. It just feels like a happy ending."

"You're so cheesy," Victoria teased, nudging him.

"Well, it's not an ending," Marshall pointed out. "There's lots of life left to live."

"I know. It was just a random thought. Forget I said it," Ted shrugged. Victoria rested her chin on his shoulder, rubbing his back. As the snow fell gently outside, Barney and Robin gazed into each other's eyes, oblivious to the others who were laughing and talking. In a way, Ted was right. It did feel like a happy ending, and even if there was more to come, they'd all be in it together. Robin had made Barney realize he could love again and be happy, and Barney had made Robin realize she could be vulnerable and still independent. They would grow together and maybe one day get married. Who knows what could happen? For now, they'd just take it one day at a time. Together.

 **The End**

* * *

 **This just felt like a good place to end this story. I hope you all enjoyed. Thank you for following, favoriting, and reviewing!**


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